


Taken

by Missparrow101



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:55:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 22
Words: 42,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29330406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missparrow101/pseuds/Missparrow101
Summary: He remembered the first time he saw that she looked him straight in the eyes, not once letting her eyes linger to his burns. It had meant something for him, more than she could have ever known. And now was the time to have her all to himself. Completely...
Relationships: Sandor Clegane/Sansa Stark
Comments: 109
Kudos: 131





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> This story has been published before on fanfiction, but I was not completely happy with it! So here is the new version, and I will continue here instead of fanfiction. I hope you enjoy!
> 
> This story contains a dark Sandor, hence the rating of this story!
> 
> If you are not in for a dominant Sandor than maybe this is not the story for you!

He had been watching her for half a year now. She was young, pretty and just lovely as a person. However they had never officially met, he saw her weekly, sometimes even daily. The girl worked in a supermarket. She played the hostess, helping customers with questions and complaints. He shook his head. Not that he could come up with a single complaint while she was in the store.

He guessed she was about 17, or 18 maybe, he didn't knew. He would buy his groceries, taking his time so he could watch her. She was always smiling, her beautiful white teeth straight behind her pretty lips. She had long auburn red hair, and a pale skin. He was not sure what about her made him like her so much, but he just could not suppress the urge to see her, be with her.

It started innocent. He would just watch her in the store and that was all. But now, after half a year, he had come up with a plan. A plan that would bring them together, away from everyone else, away from society. He had done some research and searched for her on facebook. He knew she was living alone, and was single. It was enough information for him to start planning. She would be his, and his alone. He quickly went home, prepared his camper and then went to sleep that night. It would be his last night alone. Tomorrow he would be with the girl he loved. He sighed and turned on his back. He knew she would not like him at first, maybe not for a long while. But he needed to be with her, he needed her smiles and love. He remembered the first time he saw that she looked him straight in the eyes, not once letting her eyes linger to his burns. It had meant something for him, more than she could have ever known. And now was the time to have her for himself. Completely.


	2. Chapter 2

Sansa was almost done brushing her long red hair and run out the door to get in her car. Every morning the same routine. She would hear her alarm clock in time to get up, but she always took another few minutes to finally leave her warm bed. It were those few minutes that made her hurry so she would still be on time to get to work. She quickly grabbed her keys and her lunchbox before she left her apartment. Fumbling with her car keys she hastily opened the doors to her small Renault and entered her car. She was lucky her job was just 15 minutes away, otherwise she would have never been on time. She hated getting up early, but she needed the money if she wanted to live on her own. She thought back on how she was always fighting with her mother after her father died and that thought made her eager to get to work. The parking lot was empty when she entered and parked her car. Like every morning. The supermarket she worked at opened at 8 a.m. every morning, 7 days a week.

'Here we go again,' she softly murmured locking her car and walking over the parking lot. She placed her keys in her coat and clutched her lunchbox to her chest. Sometimes she felt sad, fearing this was her life. Day after day working in that store, trying to get enough money to finally go to college, even though she knew that would probably be never. She had a lot of siblings and her mother had no job, so no money to help her in any way. It was fine, really. She didn't needed her mother, well at least she didn't wanted to need her mother. For now she was doing fine on her own, and maybe, just maybe she would get a promotion at her job. Sansa entered the store and her day went by slowly. She tried her best to help every customer to their needs, but couldn't help but feel a little sorry for herself that day. When it was almost 5 and she was about to go home, her manager came up to her. She took a deep breath and greeted him politely. He smiled and asked if she had a few minutes to talk with him. She nodded and followed him into his office.

Half an hour later Sansa stood outside the store and could not believe what just had happened. Her manager had offered her paid education. She would work half the time, the other half would be spent in school. She just couldn't believe her ears. Her manager would arrange everything, pay for everything. She smiled from ear to ear as she walked to her car. She merely noticed a man with half long hair and a burn on half of his face, she recognized him as one of her customers and nodded into his direction. He nodded back, smiling to her. She smiled back, feeling happy as she was. She really could not believe it, could this be too good to be true?

Sansa started her car and drove home, her mind full with happy thoughts and her body full with a happy feeling. It was then she noticed her gas was low and she needed to fill up her tank. She hummed while she turned and went to the local gas station. She kept humming while she stepped out of her car and placed her card into the machine. It was an unmanned station, which she liked for it took less time to get the job done. She noticed how a camper drove behind her and stopped. She didn't pay much attention to her surroundings, her mind still twisting and turning on how she could be so lucky. When her tank was full she turned to close the car's full tank and almost bumped into a man. To say she was startled was an understatement. She had to take a deep breath when she saw it was not just any man she had bumped into. It was the guy from the store, the one with the burns and the long hair. The immense, broad and more bear than guy one. She swallowed painfully. She was not exactly scared of him, but he always made her curious about him. She saw him daily and thought of him as a friendly type. So no matter his immense seize and broad shoulders, she was not so fearful she would have been, bumping into anyone else.

'I'm sorry if I startled you. I was just wondering if you could help me. I need gas and I have never been good with this whole unmanned thing. Do I put my card in first?' Sansa smiled at him and nodded. She could understand how this could be confusing to people. The relief of the man being him and not someone else she had never seen before made her feel better instantly and she turned to help him. 

'I'll show you, it's quite easy actually." Sansa walked with him to his camper and turned to show him the steps on the board of instruction when she suddenly felt a cloth being pressed against her mouth and nose. She tensed up completely and tried to fight him off with all her might, but he wasn't only so much bigger he was much more stronger too. She felt his hold on her and knew she would not be able to fight him off. That thought made her panic. 

'I'm so sorry Sansa. Relax,' He suddenly sounded less nice, Sansa registered as she tried to push him off of her. She had always seen him as a nice, long man who lived alone and chose a sober lifestyle. Not someone who would go and harm her. He was so strong and she was feeling weaker by the second. She tried to move, tried to keep breathing, but whatever was on the cloth made her head feel heavy and she started to feel more blurry by the second.

'Easy girl, easy.' Sansa desperately tried to make a sound, any sound. But the cloth blocked it all and she slowly, but surely lost her consciousness.

Sandor eased her into his arms and quickly carried her to his camper. He hated himself for taking her this way, but he knew she would never come willingly, not with him. He gently placed her on the bed and then went to hide her car into the bushes. When he returned to his camper and locked the doors, she still was unconscious, sleeping on his bed. His heart jumped at the sight. He had wanted this for so long, had dreamt about this moment for such a long time. And now he had her. She was his. He went to his seat and started the camper. They had a long way to go, but he didn't mind. He would spend the entire ride with this girl he had come to love so much. His life was complete.


	3. Chapter 3

She remembered she had been working the day before. But that was about it. She had no clue why she was in a bed, her wrists tied together and a cloth disabling her sight. She felt nauseous and scared, desperately trying to remember where she was and with whom. She could hear a radio play and felt how her surrounding and herself moved ever once in a while. An engine roaring told her she was in a car, on the move. A bed in a car? She thought. It was then she saw the man in her mind. The very long, broad man with burns on half his face. He always seemed different from the other people that came into the store. He was so much bigger and seemed stronger. He could look grumpy and scary, but he had always been friendly to her. He had long dark hair that covered his burns most of the time. Sansa had always thought of him as a nice, easy guy. Living alone, maybe with a dog, enjoying his life. She had never feared for her safety. Why hadn't she seen this coming?

When she felt the car stop and heard the radio and engine stop too, she got nervous and wondered what he would do with her. Would she die in a car with a man she had always helped with a smile? Had he taken her to rape and murder her? What had she ever done to him other than be of service and be kind?

'I know you are awake,' came his deep voice from very close. Sansa swallowed and sat up, trying to look in the direction his voice came from. She brought her tied hands to her chest, hoping he would be merciful. She could give him money if that was what he wanted, she would promise him anything if he would let her go. Panic took over her senses as she felt her heart beat faster and faster and cold sweat appeared on her forehead. 

'How are you feeling?' he asked, this time his voice even closer. Sansa backed away, afraid he would touch her. She swallowed painfully and wanted nothing more than to just disappear into thin air. She knew who he was now, even when she was not able to see him, but that was not helping to make her calm. If anything his broad and muscular appearance only made her more afraid of what he wanted to do with her. 

'I didn't gag you, did I?' he said, this time sarcasm in his voice, scaring her even more. His voice was deep and sounded like a growl sometimes. She felt her body tense up completely. 

The bed dipped when he sat down next to her, his hands on her tied ones, pulling them down and in his lap. Sansa felt painfully aware of his large, warm hands feeling hers.

'Do you have a headache, a nauseous feeling?' he continued, his enormous hands stroking her cold ones. Sansa shook her head, too afraid to speak. She felt completely wrong about everything that was happening here and now, but she was not feeling the pains he asked her for. 

She heard him sigh and wondered if she had angered him already. He released her hands and stood from the bed.

'You better find your tongue, I'll be waiting for your bathroom call. It will be a long journey, little bird,' with those words she heard a few footsteps until she heard the engine turn on again, and the radio restarting. With so little said he went on with their journey. Sansa was desperate and scared to death. She needed him to tell her why he did this and where he was taking her. Why her? What was he going to do to her?

Sansa made it through 3 more hours until she really needed to relief her bladder. She had cried silently the entire time, feeling more tired and broken than ever. She had decided she would not ask him for anything, not even to go to the bathroom. But she had made that decision those 3 hours before, when her bladder had not been hurting her so much. Now she was swallowing her pride and she realized she didn't even know the name of this man. How should she address him? Her situation seemed more hopeless by the second.

'Sir?' she tried. Her voice sounded dull, scared and soft. Nothing changed, the radio kept playing and the car driving. Sansa bit her lip and then tried again.

'Please sir?' she then asked, a little louder this time. It worked, the car stopped, as did the radio. Heavy footsteps made their way towards her, making her shiver.

'So the bird has a tongue, hmm?' his amused voice asked her. Sansa had never felt so little, so scared in her entire life. Her body was trembling and even if she wanted to, she had no idea how to make it stop. 

'Was that the bathroom call?' he asked her when he realized how scared she actually was. Sansa nodded.

'Good, let's get you up then.' Sansa had hoped he would remove the cloth before her eyes, but he didn't. Instead he took her arms and lifted her from the bed, guiding her through a small space until his hands gently, but firmly, stopped her.

He was fumbling with her hands, until she realized he had removed the bindings around her wrists.

'The cloth stays on,' he said gruffly. Sansa nodded quickly, afraid to anger him more. If anything she wanted him to be calm with her. Everything she could remember about his appearance was strength, muscles and power. But sometimes he also seemed insecure, cautious even. Although she could not recall it so clearly now, with him as her kidnapper. She did remember that people mostly avoided even looking at him. She now understood they were cautious of this enormous man, and in this moment she could only agree with those people. 

'I will turn around, the toilet is behind you, paper on your right.'

This point had to be the most humiliated one in her young life. Being kidnapped, forced to use the toilet in front of a grown man. A kidnapper. If he wanted to hurt her he now had her fully at his mercy. Sansa had no tears left and slowly let het jeans down, finally relieving her hurting bladder. Her head was hurting now and she was afraid of what the man would do to her. After she even found the sink to wash her hands, the man chuckled at her.

'Such a neat bird, aren't ya?' Sansa decided to remain silent, not sure how the man was reacting to her.

He took her arm in his hand, again firm but not ungentle, and guided her back to a chair this time, placing a seatbelt around her.

'I can tie you up again, I will only give you the chance of limited freedom once. If you harm my trust in you, I will not give you a second chance.' Sansa nodded quickly. Afraid of what he would do when she would not react in time. 

'Good.'


	4. Chapter 4

The ride had been silent since Sansa was in the passenger seat. She wondered when he would remove the blindfold and why he even bothered to keep her from seeing him. She had seen him the day before. She knew who her kidnapper was. And then to think he was a customer she saw almost every day, someone who she thought to be friendly and trustable… How wrong could she have been?

'Are you hungry?' came his gruff voice, startling Sansa in her seat. She heard him sigh when she was startled and trembled.

'No sir, I'm fine,' she answered ever so softly. She was still trying to not anger him in any way, not sure how this friendly giant had been able to to such a thing as taking her. 

'You're sure fine to me, little bird. But I won't let you starve.' Sansa had no idea what he meant with those words and kept quiet. The vehicle they were in came to a halt and she heard him unbuckle his seatbelt. Realizing he was moving and probably coming for her made her even more scared and she tensed up even more. She hated not being able to see. She wanted nothing more than to have her eyes back.

'May I remove the blindfold?' Sansa dared to ask, even though her voice sounded frightened, weak even. He scraped his throat.

'Not yet.' Those words, that voice and tone, it was all he needed to keep her in check. She was repeating the same words in her head, over and over again.

"Keep calm, keep quiet. I will survive this."

'Have you ever camped, little bird? Or stayed out in the open.' Sansa swallowed and was unsure why he was asking this, why did he want to know that?  
She then shook her head. She had never camped or anything like that.

'Ah, so you're the luxurious motel hotel type then I guess,' he said. It sounded like he was judging her, like it was a bad thing. In all her fear she felt her pride too and was not going to sit here and be told she was someone who had enjoyed only the finer things in life. She had been working her ass off for years. 

'No I am not,' she said, the little venom in her voice was obvious. She wondered where her courage came from. He chuckled, like her tone amused him greatly.

'So, what kind of holiday type are you then my fine bird?'

Sansa took a deep breath and licked her lips. Why was he even speaking to her? Hadn't he taken her to rape of kill her? Why make conversation?

'I never went on holidays sir,' she told him. There came no instant reply. After a few minutes of her silence and him rumbling around her in the vehicle she suddenly felt him push something in her hands.

'Some bread. It is not much of a dinner, but It'll have to do for tonight.' She felt the piece of bread and then tore the tiniest bit off, slowly bringing the piece to her mouth. She felt so weird with the blindfold on, and she felt even worse when she realized why she was even here, with this man.

'Where are we going?' Sansa asked him, after she had finished her piece of bread and didn't hear him move around her anymore. His voice came from very close by.

'Far from home,' was all she heard him say. It gave her shivers and made her heart sink. Far away from home? Her chest suddenly hurt all over.

'Why?' she asked, her voice breaking, giving away her fear for him.

He sighed deeply and then she felt his fingers on her cheek. She tensed up even more, feeling the muscles in her neck and shoulders protest. 

'There is no life for me here, not a fair one. I need you little bird. I will keep you close. We can't have that here. This is the only solution.' Tears left Sansa eyes, hearing his words and picturing what would happen to her. The tears were falling from her eyes, but were instantly absorbed by the cloth around her eyes.

'How old are you?' he asked her then. Sansa had to swallow twice to stop herself from a panic attack. She felt the direction of his questions was now going to the information he actually wanted from her. And that frightened her a lot.

'I'm 18 years old,' she answered meekly, broken. His fingers left her cheek, after stroking her gently.

'So young, so beautiful.' That she heard him being nothing but truthful in his words only added to her fear of the man and what he would be capable of. 

'Can I remove the blindfold sir?' she asked again. She needed to see her surroundings, if only to keep herself sane and calm. He sighed again.

'No, not tonight. We will retire and see about it in the morning little bird.' Sansa instantly stiffened, only now thinking about the fact she would have to spend the night with him too. And all the nights to come if he kept her here. And what would he do to me at night? Her fears only grew and grew.

He moved around and then she heard and felt him unbuckle her seatbelt too.

'I will guide you to the bed, you can sleep there,' he said, taking her arm with his hand. He gently guided her through the vehicle and stopped her when her knees raked the soft side of the bed.

'The bed is on your left. Do you want to change your clothes or-' She quickly shook her head. She would not undress in front of him. The more clothes she wore, the better. His hand left her arm.

'Go on then, lie down. I will join you shortly.' Sansa did as she was told, wondering if she could steal a glance now he had left her to herself for the moment. She wondered, but did not dare.

She sat down and felt the soft sheets with her hands, easily locating the pillows. She crept to the side of the bed and lied her head down, wondering how much more tears she had left to spare. Her eyes felt painful and swollen already. 

The only thing distracting her from sobbing now were his footsteps approaching her. She felt the bed dip and heard him ruffle with clothing. Was he undressing himself? Was he serious about sleeping with her in the same bed?

She felt how the bed moved when he lied down his arm briefly touching hers when he rearranged himself next to her. Sansa froze and prayed that he would not hurt her. She tensed all over and prayed hard. 

'You are scared.' It was a statement, not a question. Still, Sansa nodded as a reply.

It took him a few minutes to speak again, his voice so low, so deep.

'Sleep little bird, we have a long journey before us and I plan on leaving early in the morning.' Sansa turned on her side, away from him. It gave her a little rest to know he was not touching her, or hurting her. But that feeling only lasted until he moved again, this time bringing his body close to hers, his front against her back. Sansa noticed he smelled like gasoline and earth, and something else, something completely unknown. She also felt how big and broad he was behind her. His legs touching hers, his chest against her back. All these facts added to hear already present fear. And she then even felt his manhood press into her.

She kept repeating her words from earlier.

"Keep calm, keep quiet. I will survive this."

It was a hand in her long hair, gently caressing it, that made her shriek. He stilled instantly, as did she. He slowly moved his hand again when she kept silent and still, letting her long locks slide between his fingers.

'Your hair is so beautiful, like all of you, my little bird. It smells divine.' Sansa cried some more tears, but not moved an inch. When his hand left her hair, and he turned on his back, she dared to take a deep breath. How would she ever be able to sleep like this, in here, with her kidnapper right beside her.

'Just wake me when you need to take a piss. No funny stuff little bird.' Those words made it very clear to her that this was really happening and there was nothing she could do to escape it. Tonight, for the first time in her short life, she had to spend the night with a man. A bear of a man.


	5. Chapter 5

It was going to be a very long night. Sansa could not recall a night that had felt like forever, but this one did. She felt completely worn out. She was glad she did not need to use the bathroom, for she had promised herself she would not wake him. Not even if her bladder exploded.

She sighed softly and wondered why this had to happen to her. She had been a good girl. She worked hard and tried to be friendly to everyone she met. What had she done to deserve to be kidnapped by an enormous man that would not tell her where he was taking her or what he would do to her?

Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes when she thought about everything he could do to her. He was so big and broad and she so fragile and small compared to him. How would she ever fight him off? The blindfold was getting wet with her tears, not a single tear making its way from underneath the blindfold to her cheeks. She sighed again feeling nothing but utter dispair. 

This night would last forever…

It was the movement of the vehicle they were in that woke Sansa with a start. She sat up straight when she noticed they were driving again. It took her another second to notice she was still wearing the blindfold, something that bothered her a lot. She wrapped her arms around herself.

'Good morning little bird. Have you slept well?' came the gruff voice she was starting to fear more and more. She shuddered on her spot on the bed.

'Good morning,' she softly whispered afraid what he would do if she would not answer him, turning her head around to locate where he was in the vehicle. She wondered how blind people got through their days, not even able to see where people they were conversing with, sat.

'Can I please take the blindfold off?' she added a little louder. He could not make her wear it forever, could he?

'I am surprised you are still wearing it. But I guess that the good little bird does as she is bid, does she not?' he said. She heard the mockery in his voice, but choose not to answer it. Instead she quickly removed the cloth and watched around her. Her eyes had to adjust to the light of day, even though she could tell the day had only just begun. The first thing she saw was the vehicle she was in. It was some sort of mobile home, even bigger than she had originally thought.

'You can join me here, in the passenger seat.' His voice gave her shivers and this time she did not instantly do as she was bid. She took a glance in his direction behind the wheel, seeing his upper body from behind. His head was towering above the head seat, his long hair bound together with a leather piece. His enormous hands on the wheel made her even more nervous than before.

'Little bird?' he asked. Sansa stood and while looking around her she slowly made her way towards the front of the camper, still not wanting to anger him in any way. So far he not harmed or hurt her, but would that last?

When she reached him and could see the side of his face he suddenly turned his head and locked eyes with her, startling her. She had known who he was because of his voice, but now, seeing his face, the burns and his long hair, there was no denying it anymore. The man was a brute, an immense muscles and broad guy and he had taken her. Just like that. 

'Sit down and buckle up,' he commanded as she hesitated what to do, his voice firm but not unkind. She nodded, quickly lowering her gaze, sitting down next to him in the passenger seat and taking the seatbelt in her shaking hands.

'Where are we going?' she dared to ask again. She saw him watch her from the corner of her eye, but did not dare to lock eyes with him. Not again. He installed more fear in her than she wanted him to know. But she had a feeling he was quite aware of that. 

'Far away, like I told you yesterday.' HIs tone made it clear that was the final answer to that question. Sansa swallowed and licked her lips. Was he driving towards the boarder or something?

'Where are we right now?' she asked, wondering how long it took for him to grow agitated and angry by her questions.

He only chuckled, he sounded amused.

'Smart bird you are indeed. Don't worry your pretty head about it. I will keep you safe. No need to know where we are headed.' Sansa had to bite her lip to keep herself from screaming or crying. Why was he treating her like this?

'Are you hungry?' he asked her then, his voice different this time, more gentle. Like he could be nice if he wanted to. If she acted like he wanted.

'No,' she quickly said, looking through her window, only now noticing there was a rough landscape on the other side of her window.

'Such a bad liar you are,' he told her. He reached behind him and then handed her some bread.

'We will stop tonight and I will make you some proper dinner then.' Sansa stole a quick glance, but when she saw his eyes watching her she watched her piece of bread instead. She felt the tears burn behind her eyes again and never had felt the skin under her eyes being this raw.

'You look like shit, haven't you slept at all?' he asked her. Sansa's eyes grew wide at the insult, quickly remembering it was better when he didn't liked her than when he did. She turned her body in her seat, leaning away from him, not answering. She would hate to admit it, but she felt a little offended. She knew most men liked watching her red hair and fair skin, something she liked about herself too. So to be told she was looking like shit… She tried to ignore her feelings and remembered if he did not like the way she looked, maybe he would set her free.

'You better answer me when I ask you something girl,' he scolded her. She dared to watch him, not surprised to see him looking back. His grey eyes seemed so intense and sharp. It took her breath away for a moment. She then looked at the rest of his face.

The burns weren't so bad, but visible. It made him look even rougher, scarier, she now thought.

'It frightens you, my scars don't they?' he rasped. Sansa quickly shook her head. He huffed.

'Don't bother lying to me. Besides, I will be the only person you will see from now on out. A long time to spend without talking and touching someone, if you know what I mean.' Sansa watched with question written all over her face, making him chuckle once more. That made her blush. Why was he saying that and what was he refering to? 

'You will understand in time, my innocent bird.'

'You cannot force me to stay with you,' she then said, her tone scolding, only realizing her words after she had spoke them. He turned his head again, locking eyes with her. She saw the anger in the grew eyes. And for a moment she felt afraid, truly afraid of what this bear of a man was capable of. 

'You think I cannot, little bird? Do you have any idea what I can do to you, without anyone interfering it? I could take you on the floor of this camper without anyone even noticing it. Fucking you bloody. Hell I could do anything without anyone noticing it.' His harsh words brought tears to her eyes. She turned her head away and reached to unbuckle her belt to leave him alone.

'Don't, you will sit here, with me,' he told her. His tone was firm and final. Sansa wiped her tears away and decided to just remain silent. She had been right about him kidnapping her and her fears about him forcing himself upon her. She had to stay strong. She had to if she wanted to make it out of this situation. 

'Yesterday you told me you were 18,' he rasped. Sansa did not reply.

'So why the blushing and tears, I would make you like it. If you behaved, that is,' he said. She heard he was mocking her again, but she was playing dead. Maybe he would grow tired eventually. She didn't want for him to know his words and actions scared her so much her chest hurt uncontrollably. 

For an hour or so, both remained silent, apart from him cursing some other drivers. Sansa was lost in her thoughts and fears, her eyes staring outside the window, but not seeing anything at all. She almost screamed when he placed his large hand upon her knee, tensing all over feeling his enormous hand on her knee.

'Have you ever been to the sea, little bird?' he asked her. Sansa had been so lost in her mind she had not noticed their surroundings anymore. She was startled by his touch, but then watched his eyes before she looked outside. They were near the sea. It was a beautiful day and the waves crashed upon each other and the beach.

'We are near the sea?' she asked herself, but of course he heard her.

'Let's take a walk, hmm?' he rasped beside her. He unbuckled himself and parked the camper near the beach and rocks. Sansa nervously watched around, but there was no one to be seen. Would he really let her out of the camper? Wasn't he afraid she would run? Did she even dare to?

She watched him nervously, not sure if he was joking or not.

'Come,' he said, motioning for her to follow him. He walked towards the middle of the camper, opening the door and taking something from a cabinet. Sansa unbuckled and followed, although she kept her distance. When he stood he was almost 2 whole heads bigger than she was and so much broader than her tender frame. He was muscled and very broad. Those facts kept her mind occupied, until she saw what he was holding in his hand.

'I would not kill you, even if you ran. And I would rather not wound you to keep you with me. But don't make the mistake I won't use it,' he said, watching her eyes on the gun in his hand. Sansa swallowed and took a step back, she felt sick to her stomach and felt tears form in her eyes thinking about how dangerous he actually was and what he could force her to do, owning a gun. 

'I'd rather stay- stay in here,' she mumbled, her eyes glued to the gun. He placed the gun on the inside of his trousers, secured by his belt.

'Well, I don't, follow me.' Sansa kept staring at him until he had stepped outside and waited for her to follow him. She hesitated.

'Come, come, we don't have all day,' he mocked her. She slowly stepped outside, feeling the sun on her skin. It felt good.

He closed the camper door and locked it, taking her arm in his hand, pulling her close.

'No running, no screaming, those are the rules.' She quickly nodded, her eyes traveling down to where he was holding her arm in a tight grip. He instantly loosened his touch.

'You are allowed to remove your shoes, but no further in the water than your calves,' he joked, releasing her and walking towards the rocks and sea. Sansa watched him and very slowly followed. Although she was scared of him and his gun, she enjoyed being outside and in the sun. It was quite warm outside, something she liked very much. Her body had been so tensed all of the time that the sun made her fee a little more alive. 

'Little bird?' she heard him ask when the distance between them had grown bigger.

She approached him and saw how he sat down and made himself comfortable on the sand. Sansa walked close, and sat down, with a good 2 meters between them.

'I don't bite. Not without reason,' he joked, watching her nervous state. She stared before her.

'What is your name?' she asked. He cleared his throat.

'Some call me the hound.' He remained silent for a while, observing her taking his words in.

'But you can call me Sandor.'


	6. Chapter 6

Sansa let his name play in her head, sure she had never heard it before. Sandor. Sandor.

'You parents are poor folks?' Sandor asked her. His voice sounded harsh and gruff, like he didn't liked the fact she even had parents or something. She wondered why.

Sansa glanced beside her before she spoke, not looking him in the eye, instead keeping her eyes on the sea.

'Only after my father died.' She noticed he turned his head even more towards her.

'And your mother?' he asked. Sansa shrugged her shoulders.

"We didn't really got along anymore, I moved out.' She heard him clear his throat before he spoke.

'Well, seems like I did save ya then. Even if it is for a bit.' Sansa turned her head sharply at him.

'What do you mean?' she asked. He chuckled, for all his warnings of her to behave and listen, he seemed to enjoy her sharp words and fighting spirit.

'A young woman like yourself, living alone, barely getting by. That is unhealthy,' he said. Sansa glared at him.

'Someone kidnapping me and forcing me to stay with them, that's unhealthy,' she spoke, although a little softer when she realized who she was speaking to. She heard him move before she felt his hands on her arm, pulling her to her feet rather strongly. 

'Watch your tongue, little bird. I am not a patient man.' Sansa felt how her whole body was frozen in his grasp. Tears were burning behind her eyes once more. He could be so intimidating she felt sick thinking how he could hurt her. 

'Then what, you will shoot me? Kill me?' she asked, her words bold, but her tone broken. She saw in his eyes he noticed that too.

'No, but there are other things I could do to you, other things I have been yearning for, for so long. So choose your words wisely while insulting me, little bird, because I can only control myself for so long.' Sansa adverted her eyes after he spoke, unsure of the meaning behind his threat. His chuckle confused her even more. She decided to keep her insults for him to herself then. She did not want to find out how he would hurt her. 

'You sure you're 18? You are very easily intimidated, my innocent bird. But I like you that way.' He rasped. He was still holding her with his hands, his face so close. She did not want to watch him in the eyes, but she slowly did. He gazed back, but then his eyes lowered, watching her lips. She feared his next step, and with good reason.

His lips brushed hers gently before one of his hands buried itself in her red locks, keeping her in place. He kissed her gently first, giving her a little bit of time to recover from the shock he had seen on her face only moments before. He then kissed her with passion, his tongue asking her lips for entrance. She stood frozen at first, but then pulled back. He released her lips, but kept his hand on the back of her head.

'You'd rather have I skipped the kissing part and moved to the next chapter already?' he rasped, his hungry eyes looking deeply in her scared ones. Sansa trembled and shook her head. She felt sick and shook thinking about him forcing himself upon her more than just kissing her lips. 

'I thought so,' he said. He kissed her jaw and then her neck keeping her body close. She felt the gun at his belt, poking against her. Don't panic. Don't panic, Sansa told herself. But she shivered nonetheless. It was not that she was that repulsed by him kissing her, but the power he seemed to have over her, frightened her a lot. His lips felt warm, gentle even and... not that bad.

'We must go, come,' he told her, after he gave her lips a soft last peck. He released her arms, but took a hold of her hand, pulling her with him towards their camper.

Sansa wondered about running off for a moment, but his enormous body and muscles prevented her from trying.

Sandor waited until she stepped inside the camper and then followed her, closing and locking the door.

'It will be a long drive, I want to get there by the end of the week,' he told her, while he took place behind the wheel. She failed to respond. Before he started the car he turned and looked at her.

'The rules are easy. You don't run, you don't hurt yourself and you listen to what I say,' he growled. Sansa nodded, but kept standing in the doorway, too frightened to join him.

'Sit down.' Sansa licked her lips and the thought of escaping was very appealing, but she was too scared to do so. So she slowly made her way towards the passenger seat and sat down.

He still waited.

'Buckle up,' he told her, before finally starting the engine.

Hours passed by, and none of them spoke. Sansa tried to keep herself sane and held back her tears, but after thinking about his words and him kissing her like he had, she couldn't help the tears that leaked from her eyes. She leaned her head against the window and kept her head turned hoping he would not see her cry. She refused to let him know by wiping them away. But of course he noticed eventually.

'Little bird, are you crying?' he asked her. She noticed his voice sounded a little less harsh, but she couldn't bring herself to look at him. She turned herself away a little more, crying in silence. Why couldn't he just ignore her for now?

'Sansa? What's wrong?,' he tried again. This time he sounded worried. She noticed the car slowed down and suddenly stopped. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around herself, protecting herself the only way she knew how.

The sound of his buckle being undone tensed her even more, but when she felt him turn her seat and moving her hair out of the way, she froze completely.

'Look at me,' he ordered. But Sansa didn't dare to meet his eyes. She softly sobbed. She heard him sigh as he kneeled before her. She had no clue what to expect, but his thumb gently wiping away a tear was something she had not expected.

'Sansa, what is it?' he asked. Sansa swallowed and opened her eyes, shocked to see how close by he was sitting. His worried grey eyes watched her with such an intensity she was shocked by it. 

She shook her head, moving her hands to cover her face, but he gripped them before she could hide herself away once more.

'Tell me, why are you crying, are you in pain?' he asked, his eyes moving over her form as if he was searching her for wounds. Sansa trembled all over her body, but managed to shook her head.

One of his hands moved to her cheek, holding her there. His eyes were trying to read hers, until she closed them and softly spoke.

'Are you going to kill me?' the words lingered in the air, and to both of them it was quite clear that him killing her was her biggest fear. She heard him sigh.

'No Sansa, I will not kill you or hurt you like that. I will not use the gun on you, that I can promise,' he said. Sansa kept her eyes closed, letting his words sink in. He said he would not kill her or hurt her, but what exactly was he going to do to her.

'Let me go home, please,' she softly pleaded. She was not sure he had heard her, but when she heard another sigh, she knew he had.

'We are going home little bird. You and me together,' he said. She felt his fingers catch another tear before he lifted her chin so she would look at him. Slowly she opened her eyes.

'I can be good to you Sansa, but that works both ways. Show me you try to adjust and be happy.' Sansa did not understand why she should do just that. It was not anything she wanted. Why should she be trying to be happy living with him, while he had just stolen her from her own life. She had a job, a house and was even offered education. He had ruined everything she had worked so hard for.

'I want my old life back. That is what I want,' Sansa said. His eyes bore into hers. Suddenly they seemed a little colder than before.

'Then you will have a hell of a ride before you girl. I won't let you go. Not ever.'

His last words played over and over in Sansa's mind. He was not planning on letting her go. Not ever.

She just could not understand why he wanted her so badly. To kidnap her and go through all this trouble just to have her to himself. If he would ever get caught there would be serious consequences.

Soon it grew dark outside Sansa's window, and if Sandor noticed it, he didn't say so. They drove until stars stood high in the sky. Only then Sandor pulled the car off the road, hid their camper in some bushes and then let his eyes roam her frame next to his.

'I was to prepare us something good to eat, but something easy will have to do for now. I'm not in the mood.' Sansa adverted her eyes when he stood and lingered for a moment. She didn't even unbuckle her belt. While he was preparing something in their little kitchen, Sansa stared outside her window.

'Do I have to drag you here?' suddenly came his gruff voice. Sansa sighed and unbuckled, ever so slowly making her way over towards him. he was irritated with her, she knew and it was in her best interest to not anger him any further. 

He had placed something in a microwave and turned it on, before handing her a plate with some pieces of bread.

Sansa understood they were having soup. Not that it bothered her, he made her lose her appetite completely with his words and actions.

'I hope this is good enough for the little bird, hmm?' he mocked her, taking a bite from his bread. Sansa sat down on the bed, not even bothering to answer him. He warmed soup for the both of them and handed her a full cup.

'You can wash up and then we'll go to bed.' Sansa's eyes grew wide at this, not sure if she wanted to clean up here, with him so nearby. He noticed her distress features.

'Something wrong with that?' he asked. Sansa swallowed and quickly covered the truth with a lie.

'I don't have anything to wear after I- clean up,' she said. She immediately saw he was not believing that, that was her only reason behind her protest.

'I have clothes that will fit you. You will finish your food, then wash up and I will make sure clothes are lying on the bed when you are ready,' he said. Sansa sighed softly.

Too soon her soup cup was empty and Sandor urged her into the small wash cabin.

'We have running water, and there are some washing clothes. Don't take too long.'

Not liking this a bit, Sansa undressed and neatly folded her clothes to pile them in the corner of the cabin. She hated this, in fact she hated everything he made her do. She could be home right now, in her own bathroom! She took a cloth from the shelf and washed herself completely, taking her time. If it where 10 of 15 minutes, she didn't know, but when a loud knocking came to the door, she jumped.

'Are you still alive in there? Or do you need help perhaps,' he mocked her.

'Almost ready jeez,' Sansa muttered, quickly taking a towel from the shelf and covering herself, just as Sandor pulled the door open. Sansa's eyes grew wide and she held the towel a little tighter, afraid of the enormous man before her.

'Well then, join me in bed. The night will be cold and I was just getting used to having you beside me.' He let his eyes roam her body before he did a step back so she could get out of the cabin. On the bed she found some underwear and a long t-shirt. That was it, no more clothes to hid herself in. He himself was only in a boxershort, his naked torso muscled and so very frightening to her. He was so much stronger than she had thought. 

'What are you waiting for, we don't have all night girl,' he said, sitting down on the bed, before he laid down on his back, his eyes watching her.

'I- I'll go get changed then,' Sansa stammered, taking the clothes. His growl stopped her.

'No such thing. You will get dressed here, right now.' Sansa had almost let the clothes drop to the floor at his words.

'What- why?' she asked, suddenly very afraid. His mouth turned into a grin.

'I like to see what is mine, get moving.' Sansa felt fresh tears gather in the corners of her eyes. Why was he being such a jerk? Would he rape her tonight? Placing the clothes on the bed, Sansa wondered if she should run. Maybe she could find something to hit him with.

How would she ever survive like this?


	7. Chapter 7

Feeling sick to her stomach, Sansa swallowed. She couldn't show her body to him, she wouldn't. She was afraid, very so, but she just couldn't bring herself to drop her towel and dress in front of him. Something inside her snapped. Who did he think he was? Why should she let herself be bullied into submission by him?

'You can't force me to just do as you say. I will not let you humiliate me. I won't!' She said loudly. Tears were already in her eyes. Afraid for his response Sansa did what she could best… she fled. She turned and headed for the bathroom, hoping the keep him from finding her. In her hurry she almost tripped but managed to keep going. She winced when she felt an arm being placed around her waist, pulling her into a very solid body. Her anger was already replaced with fear now he held her so firmly to his body. She felt every muscle and winced thinking about how strong he really was, especially compared to her.

'Don't make me, please don't,' Sansa cried. She kept her eyes closed, tears leaking over her cheeks. She could feel him breathing behind her and she wondered how long he was going to wait before he would rip the towel from around her and molest her. Everything hurt and her view was blurry because of her tears. 

'Don't cry little bird, come now,' he shushed her. Sansa felt how he spun her around in his arms and kept her close. She didn't dare to open her eyes and kept them tightly shut, causing Sandor to chuckle. With a swift motion he picked her up in his arms and turned, walking them over towards the bed. She tried to keep the towel in place, covering herself as good as she could. He very gently placed her on top of the sheets, his eyes warm with an emotion Sansa had not seen before.

'I'll go take a piss, better use that time to get dressed little bird,' he said. He turned and left. Sansa would not let that opportunity go to waste. She quickly picked her clothes from the floor and threw them on, hurrying to be covered with the sheets by the time he came back.

When he returned his chuckle haunted Sansa's ears. She felt how the bed dipped when he sat down and took place, lying beside her. At first, nothing happened, but then she felt an arm around her waist, pulling her closer. He was still half naked and Sansa was happy she was wearing at least something to shield her naked skin from his. 

'Such a delicate bird, aren't ya?' he chuckled, kissing her forehead. Sansa shuddered in his grasp, afraid to ruin his apparent good mood. He nestled himself even closer and she felt his manhood once more. Sansa had no experience on that field, but she felt he was well endowed and that scared her even more. 

'Sleep my little bird, tomorrow will be a long drive, but then we will be at our first stop. You deserve a real bed to sleep in.' With those words he got comfortable and kept Sansa in his arms while he slowly fell asleep.

Sandor had been true to his word. The next day was completely filled with Sandor behind the wheel and Sansa beside him in the passenger seat, staring outside. She found it boring to just watch outside, without even speaking. The reason for her silence was that the only living being in here was Sandor, and she refused to talk to him, and she was still a little afraid to do so.

'You are very silent today, little bird, why aren't you chirping like you usually do?' he asked her. She heard he was trying to make a joke, but she couldn't help for being afraid to anger him with her answers. She choose to speak as little as she could.

'Just tired,' she muttered, keeping her eyes on the road, and not on her kidnapper. She heard him huff, but then he mumbled a reply.

'Well tonight you'll be able to sleep like a little bird should, on cushions as soft as feathers.'

It was dark when Sandor suddenly left the highway and for an hour or so drove them through the woods. It made Sansa more nervous and afraid to leave the road and be completely at the mercy of this enormous man.

'Where are we going?' Sansa couldn't help to ask in a very soft, scared voice. This got Sandor's attention.

'A place that I know very well, we won't be disturbed there.' Sansa had to force herself to keep from crying. He would hurt her at that place, she was sure of it.

'What can I do so you will let me go?' she suddenly asked. It made Sandor hit the brakes, causing the vehicle to suddenly stop, in the midst of the woods. His grey eyes found her watery ones. Maybe he had expected her to beg or ask him again to let her go and he would be angry, but she found she could no longer hold it inside of her. 

'Little bird-' he started, but Sansa was already in tears beside him.

'Please, I can't live like this. I don't want to be afraid all the time. Please let me go, please!' she suddenly begged him. Sandor huffed and cleared his throat.

'No need to be afraid, you are safe with me,' he answered darkly and started driving again. Sansa had no clue how to persuade him any further. She was afraid of him, not anything else! She needed for him to let her go.

It took them another hour to finally reach Sandor's secret place. He parked the car near a little wooden cabin, unbuckling his belt. The way the car was shielded by the trees made Sansa worry even more. No one would be able to find the car there. And they had driven so deep into the forrest she was sure no one would come here to seek her. If anyone was seeking her at all, that was.

'Our first stop, come,' he said. When Sansa did not reach for her seatbelt, he did.

'I won't ask again, now come before I hoist you over my shoulder,' he threatened. It was enough to get Sansa to move.

It was very dark outside, meaning they were really somewhere remote, and nobody would find her here. Not that anybody would be looking for her, she reckoned, that feeling made her even more afraid and helpless. 

Sandor had a tight grip on her upper arm, escorting her into the cabin. She stood perfectly still until he lighted a candle, or two.

'Make yourself comfortable little bird, I'll get some stuff from the camper.' Sansa watched him leave and suddenly running away seemed possible. She feared what he would do if he caught her. But she couldn't stay here. He would harm her, she was sure of it. She looked around for a few seconds before she made her way to the door, reaching to grip the handle.

Unfortunately Sandor choose exactly that moment to walk back in, bumping against Sansa who also had a grip in the door. She stumbled back and fell on her behind with a soft shriek.

Sandor placed the boxes on the floor and towered over her.

'I thought I had warned you about escaping, didn't I?' he asked. Sansa noticed how dark his voice sounded and how harsh his grey eyes looked at her. She swallowed and crawled back, not expected for him to suddenly bow down, so he could see her eye to eye.

'Let's try again shall we. I want you in the bed, five minutes from now. You'll have your hair down, and tears dry. And I want you naked.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo Sandor is a mix of The Hound we know, maybe a little darker in this story, but I used Rory's lifestyle as inspiration for their trip. Yes in this story Sandor does some things that are questionable, but as he had led an isolated life until now and has this obsession with Sansa, it is what I have in mind! 
> 
> If you do not want to read about Sander forcing himself on Sansa.... then maybe this is not the story for you. I am not completely sure how far they will go before there comes a turning point.... or if that point will come. This story is written mostly for me to destress and enjoy myself! 
> 
> We all know Sandor has not the best communication skills and is frightening. Deep down he is a good guy, but there are a few layers to break through before we will see them! 
> 
> I love to hear your thoughts!


	8. Chapter 8

Sansa stared at his back as he again left the house to get some stuff from the camper. Her heart felt like it had stopped beating for a few seconds. He would hurt her tonight. She just knew it. He would hurt her for trying to escape. Images of him on top of her frightened her beyond belief. She had felt his enormous manhood and remembered his earlier threats about fucking her bloody. Sansa slowly turned around, only now seeing the space around her. The cabin was not very big. There was only one other door than the front door. That had to be the bathroom. In the far side of the room was a big bed, next to it a drawer and then a small living area. The kitchen was completely made out of wood and seemed simple, but sufficient. The cabin was neat, maybe a little dusty. Swallowing hard Sansa's mind was working very hard to think of a solution for her current situation. What if she tried to leave again? Maybe he wouldn't see her this time?

A part of her wanted to try that… but she was too scared to do so. Tears slowly leaked from her eyes as she walked over towards the bed and sat down, not able to undress, like Sandor had told her to do. If he was going to hurt her, he would have to undress her himself. She would not help him molest her, she wouldn't. As to compromise, Sansa did let her hair down and she took off her shoes. She anxiously awaited for Sandor to return inside. It took him less than ten minutes. He carried a big bag, that he dropped before he locked the door behind him, putting the key in his pocket.

'Are you deaf girl, or are you trying to test my patience?' he asked her harshly when he turned and saw her sitting on the edge of the bed, still fully dressed. Sansa's tears blurred her vision a bit, but she saw him standing tall, taking her in.

'I asked you a question,' he said, his deep voice very clear in the silent cabin when she remained silent.

'I won't do as you say so you can hurt me,' Sansa said, although her voice sounded very soft and small next to Sandor's, she was defying him. He took a step in her direction after she had said those words. Sansa flinched, what he did notice. 

'You still don't understand who is in charge here, do you little bird? Like I told you before, I can do anything I want, there is nobody to stop me here. I want you willing and obedient, you still are not in the slightest. Let's remedy that, right now.'

He took the last step towards Sansa and gripped her by her forearms, pulling her from the bed into a standing position. Sansa noticed how his grey eyes seemed too dark, and it scared her a lot. Her soft sobs were ignored by Sandor as he none too gently removed her clothes, all of them, until she stood before him completely naked.

'Stop, stop!' Sansa cried, but she did not dare to stop him. Sandor's big hands pushed her onto the bed when she was completely bare.

'Don't move,' he darkly said, turning to the bag he had brought in. Sansa tried to cover herself with her hands, while he seemed to search through the stuff in the bag. Sansa felt afraid and cold and tried her best to shield her breast from his view, while she kept her legs firmly closed.

When he turned and Sansa saw what he had grabbed, she tried to get away from the bed.

'I said, don't move, when will it get through your head that you are mine!' he said through gritted teeth. He turned her on her belly and brought her arms behind her back, tying them with the robe he had grabbed. Sansa now cried harder, terrified of him and his actions. When he had tied her arms together pretty good, he turned her on her back and stared down at her, his eyes dark and his mouth a thin line.

'No chance of getting away now little bird. You won't wear clothes until I trust you will not try to escape again.' Sansa shuddered, tears still leaking from her eyes. She saw how Sandor watched her face and her tears, before he watched her breasts and then let his eyes roam even lower onto her body. Sansa kept her legs firmly pressed together, feeling sick to her stomach thinking about what he could and probably would do to her. He chuckled at that.

'Think that would stop me, little bird?' He sat down on the bed next to her and traced a hand on her knee, slowly making his way upwards. Sansa almost panicked as she felt his big, rough hands move towards her upper thigh. He brought his other hand up on her other leg, mimicking his actions. When he had both his hands on her upper thighs, he easily pulled her legs apart. Sansa winced and begged him to not hurt her, but his glare stopped her plies.

'You don't learn, do you girl?' he said. He slowly let one hand glide in between her legs, a finger going slowly through her folds. Sansa closed her eyes and cried silent tears, her body shaking from fear. Sandor watched her face while he again let his finger slide through her folds. She was scared to death, as she should be when she was not listening to him. He wanted to teach her a lesson, one she would not easily forget. She was still not looking at him, her eyes firmly closed.

Sandor decided to explore a little more, sliding one, thick finger into her opening. That made Sansa tense even more. She opened her eyes and found his, staring directly into hers.

'Still feeling good about that attempt to escape, little bird?' he taunted her. He felt how tight she was, and the look on her face told him she was in pain, so he slowed his movements, but still slowly slit his finger into her, as deep as he could. She was tensing even more, her muscles contracting around his finger, trying to get it out of her.

'Such a tight little bird, you are,' he mocked. Sansa tried to keep her breathing even, but it was hard. His finger deep inside her was not pleasant at all.

'I'm sorry, please,' she softly said, hoping he would stop soon.

'Sorry about escaping, or sorry about being naked and completely at my mercy, little bird?' he asked her, slowly pulling his finger from within her, only to softly rub her clit. Sansa's mouth formed a soft moan, not sure why she suddenly felt so much better. Sandor chuckled, and stood, leaving her on the bed. He turned her on her stomach once more, before he left her there.

'Well let's see how sorry you are then. You will stay there, silent.' Sansa let her head rest on the pillows as she heard how he moved around in the kitchen, leaving her there, naked and bound. Her body was so tense she felt like throwing up. He had just touched her, made her open her legs and endure his fingers feeling her up. What was next?

While she tried to manage her shaky breaths, Sandor fixed some dinner and every once in a while glanced in her direction, seeing her still on her stomach, legs firmly closed, but nonetheless she hadn't moved.

Maybe she was coming around. Maybe she needed a firmer hand.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo I have spent 10 days in Scotland a few years ago! I loved every bit of it. What a beautiful country. I rented a car with my best friend and started in Edinburgh, going through Inverness, the Isle of Skye, Fort William (Ben Nevis!) Glenfinnan, Glencoe, Glasgow, Sterling and back to Edinburgh. I saw many castle's, mountains, fairy pools, pub's, very friendly people and lovely nature. I can recommended it anyone. Bonnie Scotland is priceless!
> 
> It gave me inspiration to write further, from now on with my own experience with the Scottish weather and surroundings! (Yes Sansa and the Hound are heading into Scotland)

For Sansa it seemed an eternity, laying there on the bed, fully at his mercy. She could hear him move around her in the little cabin. He was preparing some food, she could smell it. The whole scene kept playing through her head, and she felt like being sick, fearing he would continue his touches from before.

She could still feel his finger inside of her and it made her even more terrified of this man. He had shown her he could and would do just as he pleased, and she would have no say in it, none at all. She had closed her eyes and tried very hard to picture herself home, in her little apartment. How she would be on the couch right about now, reading some book or watching TV by herself.

She shivered a bit lying on the bed, it was cold, especially wearing no clothes.

'Are you hungry little bird?' she suddenly heard his voice rasp towards her. Sansa felt tears leak from her eyes mumbling a soft "no". She felt like throwing up, not like eating at all.

'Are you sure, after this meal I don't know when I'll prepare another real meal, little bird.' Sansa choose to ignore him, not trusting her own voice anymore. She heard his footsteps come even closer, fearing he would touch her some more. She clenched her legs even tighter together, eyes closed and tears down her cheeks.

His hands did touch her though. She felt his hands on her arms, very gently turning her on her back. Even though his touch was gentle and not as scary as before, Sansa feared him so. She was again on her back, naked with her hands bound behind her back.

'Tears won't help anyone here Sansa,' he said. She noticed his voice was different, kinder maybe. She swallowed and watched the ceiling above them, not able to watch at him. She felt so ashamed, so tiny in his presence.

'I will release your hands, but you will remain like this, unclothed, until I know you won't try to escape again,' he explained, taking a knife and pulling her upwards against his broad chest. Her shivers didn't went unnoticed by Sandor, but for now he choose to ignore them. In a swift motion he undid the rope and her arms were free again.

'You can use the covers if you are cold,' he said, before he stood and walked back towards the kitchen. Sansa quickly huddled under the covers, trying to hide herself as much as possible.

"It doesn't matter he has seen everything already!" her mind screamed at her. And she also knew that if he wanted to he could touch her any way he liked, any time.

'Come and eat,' he warned her, sitting down to eat something himself. Sansa slowly pulled the covers to wrap around herself, before she slowly moved over towards where he was sitting.

She let her eyes roam his broad figure. He was so much bigger than she was. He was muscular and really tall. His deep, dark voice gave her the shivers every time he opened his mouth, and then his hands… They fitted him, being as big as he was. Not that, that fact made her feel any better at all.

'How long are we staying here,' she dared ask after a few minutes of silence between the two of them. Sander looked at her, weighing her question before he answered, his voice deep.

'A day or two, I reckon.' It was all the information he would share about their place for now. Sansa feared he would tie her up as soon as he'd finish eating, fidgeting on her chair, feeling too sick to try even one little bite.

'Eat,' he urged her once more, after he'd finished everything on his own plate. Sansa bit her lips, shaking her head.

'I don't feel good enough to eat. Not right now,' she softly said, looking at the table instead of him. She heard him sigh and ten move his chair, frightening her enough to make her jump from her seat. When her eyes met his she saw recognition, sadness and then determination.

'Fine then, don't go whining tomorrow when you're hungry.' Sansa sighed in relief when he took the things off the table, before he stood before her, eyeing her. She had a firm grip on the covers around her, afraid of this big brute that had kidnapped her and molested her within a few days' time.

'Time for bed, little bird.' His voice sounded raspy, and low. It made her stand immediately, what surprised him as she could see in his eyes. Sansa would not say it, but his earlier behavior had frightened her a lot and she was trying to be more obedient, for her own sake.

He motioned towards the bed, where she slowly sat down, her big eyes following his every move as he went to undress himself. Her eyes checked the rope beside the bed every once in a while, afraid he would tie her up again. It made her eyes water only thinking about it.

'What is it girl, why are you crying,' his ruff voice suddenly asked. Sansa quickly wiped her tears away, avoiding looking up at him.

'Nothing. Sorry,' she hasted herself to say. His cleared his throat, knowing exactly what thoughts were in her mind.

'Lie down.' Her upper lip trembled, but she did as he bid, lying down on her side of the bed, the covers still firmly rolled around herself. It took him a few seconds to pull the covers from her naked body, to arrange them over her, not around her as previous. Sansa then noticed he was only in some underwear now, his naked muscular chest, covered in cuts and scars visible to her eyes.

If he noticed her staring eyes he did not mentioned it. He stepped in the bed beside her, pulling the covers over himself, so they both lie beneath them. He in his underwear, she completely naked.

'I will not bind you tonight, little bird. But do not misunderstand me. One more escape attempt and I will bind you, day and night.' Sansa shivered.

'It will get chilly tonight. Though you will not wear anything to bed. That is to be your punishment. If you are cold, You can cling your little body to mine,' his words came slow, deep and harsh. Sansa moved herself to the edge of the bed, as far as she could get from him, without falling from the bed. She would rather freeze to death then touch him of free will. She hated him and feared him. He made himself comfortable and sighed, closing his eyes.

Sansa already knew the days to come would be hard, but she just realized it were the nights she dreaded most.


	10. Chapter 10

Sansa had never endured a colder night, waking up still shivering. Despite feeling frozen, she was proud of herself for not giving in to Sandor. She had not slept much at all, the entire night thinking about how to warm herself up without touching or angering Sandor. She had found nothing. Sandor had told her they would be staying here for a day or two. What would they be doing in those days here? Would he touch her again? She felt a shudder going through her, remembering how his big finger had felt inside of her, and how she had tensed making it a rather uncomfortable experience. 

Sansa knew about sex but had never experienced it herself, and she'd rather not experience it with Sandor and his large hands and enormous manhood.

'I can hear your teeth rattle from over here girl, are you so damn proud?' Came a gruff voice next to her. Sansa froze, startled at his words. She felt him move and then a big hand pulled her against his warm chest. She gave a small sound in surprise of his strength and warmth, but remained silent and still in his hold. He was so warm. She hated being here, him pulling her close, but he was so warm…

'Better, hmm." She heard him talk and felt it too, being so close to his chest. He rested behind her, her head placed on his arm, his other arm around her waist, resting against her waist. She swallowed, she understood he was too strong to fight off and she was naked and very close to his body. The feeling scared her. He felt so immensely warm. She wondered how he could be when she was feeling so cold. He seemed to radiate warmth from all over his body. 

For a few moment they just laid there in silence, Sansa finally feeling a little warmer. She was too tense to fall asleep, too tense to rest completely, but she was feeling better than the entire night before. It was when Sandor moved and got up from the bed, she hastily pulled the sheets around her and turned on her back, watching him rise. He was enormous and seemed so strong. He was muscular and broadly build, she'd gave him that, but in this situation, it scared her more than anything. Maybe in another life she could have found him attractive, even with his scars and grumpy attitude. He was a male in his prime, every part of his body well defined. But in the situation Sansa found herself in everything about that worked against her.

'See anything you like, little bird?' he mocked her, watching her eyes scan his body. She turned her head away, hearing his chuckle. He got dressed and then moved around. When she smelled coffee, she wondered if he would force her to stay naked this entire day too. Would he be that cruel? She sat up, still clinging to the covers to shield her from the cold. Within a few minutes Sandor came back into view, watching her with his dark eyes.

'You have not tried to run last night, maybe you deserve another chance…' He put the sentence as a question, but she had no clue if he was being serious or not. He took a deep breath and tossed some clothes on the bed.

'Get dressed, breakfast is ready.' As soon as he turned around, Sansa took the clothes and hastily put them on. She didn't know why he suddenly had decided her punishment was over, but she decided to just be grateful and not ask questions. He had given her, her own underwear and a warm sweater and jeans. She instantly felt better, in the warm clothes. She quickly braided her hair and moved towards the other side of the cabin, meeting Sandor at the table. He had placed coffee for both of them on the table and apparently he had baked eggs for the both of them. She sat down opposite of him. He watched her curiously and continued to eat his food and drink his coffee. She thought it best to try to do as he said, just until there would be a real opportunity to get away. He needed to think she was trying.

'Thank you,' she softly said. Taking a small sip from the coffee before her. He took a sip from his own coffee, watching her the entire time. He did not say a word, he only nodded, once. She emptied her plate, feeling more hungry than before, happy the coffee helped keep her alert, despite her short nights rest that night.

She still wondered what he had planned for them that day, would they remain here? Or move on?

'We will move on and sleep in the camper tonight,' he told her. He watched her carefully, like he was expecting her to protest. She didn't, she just watched him, nodding. He nodded too, standing from the table. He told her to clean up, he himself packing their stuff to get moving. Sansa did as he told her, washing the plates and cups, putting them in their place in the kitchen after drying them off. When she was done and turned around she shrieked, finding Sandor very close by, right before her. He seemed amused by her distress, if only for a second.

'Bad conscience?' he mocked her. She swallowed and tried to slow her racing heartbeat.

'You - You just scared me,' she answered softly, not looking up to meet his eyes. He did not like that. He placed his fingers under her chin and forced her to look up, and meet his eyes.

'Better get used to me, little bird. I am not going anywhere. Not without you anyway.'

Hours later they were on the road again, Sandor driving and Sansa sitting beside him, her eyes on the road. She had difficulties keeping her eyes open, she felt so tired. But she wanted to see where they were going, so she forced herself to stay awake and alert. Sandor was a steady driver, keeping the camper still while driving along swiftly. He had turned the radio on softly, watching her every now and then.

'Are you still awake, little bird?' came his voice after another hour. Sansa had been dozing in and out of sleep, suddenly wide awake, turning her head so she could look at him.

'Yes,' she answered, her voice betraying she had not been awake just moments before. He chuckled deeply.

'Better make sure you sleep more tonight little bird, you need it.' She thought the conversation was over with that, but he seemed to have had enough of their silence.

'Tell me about you little bird. What things do you like to do?' She was shocked. Not of his question, but because of the fact he seemed genuinely interested in her. She cleared her throat. He must be testing her. Trying to lure her in to trust him or something. She felt unsure of his motives, but tried to cooperate nonetheless. 

'Uhm- I worked a lot - to pay for school-,' she began. He interrupted her shortly.

'Did you enjoy your job?' She nervously watched him.

'Sometimes.' Her answer was soft. He locked eyes with her.

'What would you study?' That question came so unexpected she had to take a moment to take it in.

'Uhm- well, I was saving up, not nearly enough yet, before my manager told me he would pay for me to go to school. Economics and retail.' It stabbed at her chest thinking that when she finally would have been able to study, she was kidnapped and now it would never happen. She tried to not bring that up, she did not want to anger Sandor. Not now he seemed to be in such a good mood.

'Is that what you want to do? Work in a store for the rest of your life?' he asked. He sounded gruff again and she worried his good mood was over.

'I just wanted to educate myself further, I like a lot of things. Economics seemed a good way to start. Maybe have my own store someday.' He met her eyes again. After a moment he nodded.

'Smart start, I reckon.' They then fell silent again. It once again seemed Sandor was not a man of many words, until he broke the silence again.

'You are a virgin.' She felt herself grow red, not sure why he was thinking about that just now. She had difficulty meeting his eyes and saw he was not mocking her, but stating a fact. It was as if he only now thought about that fact and wanted to hear her confirm it. Should she be honest?

'What do you mean?' she asked, not sure what he wanted her to reply. He gripped the wheel a little tighter.

'Yesterday - I felt you - you are a virgin- extremely tight one too.' She grew ever more red when he referred to the night before and quickly looked away.

'I don't understand what you want me to say about it,' she answered, feeling fully ashamed.

'Tell me how that can be, Sansa, have you never had a boyfriend?' She swallowed, meeting his eyes shortly. She had no clue why he was asking that, but something inside her told her it was because he liked the fact she was a virgin and that she had never been with a boyfriend before. She had no clue why though.

'I- was too busy. With my mom and work. I just- ' she had no clue how to proceed or what to add.

'Can we speak of something else?' she asked, not meeting his gaze. His chuckle she did hear.

'Why, does talking about sex embarrass the little bird? Only to be expected I think, with you having no experience at all.' It felt like he was mocking her, but she decided to stay silent. The only experience she had was him, fingering her deeply. It had scared her a lot and she'd rather have no rematch of that event. Ever.

'We'll remedy that soon though.'


	11. Chapter 11

Sansa had remained silent after those words. She had turned in her seat, staring outside the window. She tried with all her might not to cry. He had touched her way too privately yesterday and told her he would take her virginity soon. It made her feel sick and scared to the bone. She made herself as small as she could on the passenger chair.

She was glad Sandor let her be, for now. He had remained silent too, not asking her anymore questions or threatening her virginity more than he already had.

Only when it had grown completely dark outside, Sandor parked the car between trees and bushes, shielding them from view. He unbuckled his seatbelt and got up from his chair. Sansa had closed her eyes a few minutes ago, right now, pretending she was asleep. She did not want to look at him. She did not want to do anything with him. Not even talking.

'You are awake, little bird. I know you are. Come, we will eat some and then retire.' He moved to the back of the camper. Sansa slowly opened her eyes and looked around her. Would running work this time? She shivered thinking about sleeping this night. She would be with him once more. Would he force her to sleep naked again?

She slowly got up and walked towards the little table Sandor was sitting at. He had placed some bread and meat on the table. He was already making his own sandwich, watching her join him.

'Aren't you hungry, little bird?' he asked her. She swallowed and shook her head. No, she really was not hungry at all. And he was the reason why. He took a bite from his sandwich, still watching her closely.

'You do need to eat. Even if it is just a little. I like your curves. You need to keep them on you. Now eat.' She froze at his words. He was not complimenting her. He was letting her know he had seen her body. All of it. She felt even more sick. Just to keep him from getting angry, she made half a sandwich, taking a few small bites. He finished his swiftly, drinking some water and filling her cup too.

'You can clean yourself up first, Sansa. Then return to me.' He told her, cleaning away their plates and glasses after they had eaten. She nodded once, still very nervous. She got some things and then walked towards the small cabin, washing herself as good as was possible in the small space. She then placed her underwear on, and a shirt to cover herself a bit more. She wished she could just disappear. Or Sandor would. She took a deep, shaky breath and then walked back towards the bed, finding Sandor sitting on there, reading a book.

'All clean, little bird?' he asked her, jokingly. She bit her lip, unsure why he was being this playful all of a sudden. He seemed to notice her nerves and placed the book down, getting up himself. He walked towards her and took her wrists in his big, warm hands, keeping them in his hold. He was firm, but gentle. For now.

'You act like I am going to eat you, little bird.' she slowly met his eyes, and saw how dark they seemed. He was so tall, so broad and strong. He was totally in control and that made him so scary.

'Aren't you?' she asked. Her voice broke at the last word. He noticed it too.

'Little bird…' he seemed to think his words over, before he spoke them out.

'Get in bed, I want you relaxed and naked.' He released her wrists and then walked away. She swallowed and felt tears leaving her eyes. Naked. Naked. Naked.

The word haunted her. She felt like running, yelling and crying. But she remembered how he had treated her after she had tried to run. She didn't want him to touch her like that again. Not ever. She did as he had told her, she undressed and then got into bed. She pulled the covers way high, trying to make her feel a little better. More safe.

She lay there, waiting for him to return. She knew he would. And he would do something to her. The way he had eyed her moments before had told her that much. When she did hear his footsteps return she froze. He seemed to take his time, but then she felt the bed dip as he got in, and under the covers. He moved around a bit, and then she felt his warm hands, searching for her body. He let his hand roam her side and arm, making a content sound when he discovered she was indeed, naked.

'So the bird does listen, sometimes,' he mocked her. She felt his hand move further. He stroke her back and then even lower, touching her backside. She froze even more, closing her eyes hard. He then slowly brought his hand back up, feeling her arm and then her waist, before she felt his hand close around one of her breasts. She swallowed hard. She had to comply. Maybe he would not go as far as to finger her this time. Maybe if she was obedient enough…

'Such nice tits.' His words sounded harsh, but she blushed nonetheless. He kneaded her breast a bit, then letting his fingers go over her nipple, making her gasp. He chuckled.

'Never felt that before too, I reckon.' He then suddenly pulled the blankets back, revealing her upper body and his hand around her breast. She shrieked, but he moved his mouth towards her breast, licking her nipple before he took it in his mouth, suckling softly on her sensitive flesh.

She protested, but he simply grabbed her hands in one of his and held them above her head, gaining even more access to her breasts. He moved his lips to the other nipple, giving it the same treatment. She gave small shrieks when he suckled a bit harder. He chuckled, pulling his head back.

'How's that for warming you up to me, hmm?' He pushed her on her back, still holding her hand above her head with just one large hand. Her eyes were wide open. He watched her, before he pulled the blankets away even more, watching down her body.

'Beautiful bird,' he told her, while he let his free hand touch her stomach, before he nudged it between her legs. She bit her lip. He was going to touch her again.

'No, please not again,' she whimpered. He watched her in her eyes but opened her legs nonetheless. She took shaky breaths as she waited for his intrusive fingers. She felt nothing. But then she felt how he gently let one of his big fingers slide between her feminine lips. She moved a little, startled.

'Ah, so you do respond to me.' He chuckled, spreading the wetness he found between her legs a little more. She moved a bit, trying to move away, but he simply held her a little more firmly.

'It's not natural to never fuck, little bird. I am doing you a favor.' He kept repeating the movements of his finger sliding between her lips. She felt how wet it was making her.

'I beg off you. Please stop,' she tried again. He chuckled. He did not enter her, but he did touch her clit, making her gasp suddenly. He grinned.

'Feels good, right?' he asked her. She remained silent, until he placed his thumb on her clit and rubbed her firmly. She started fidgeting under his hands as he helped her reach her orgasm.

'Good bird,' he told her softly. He rubbed her clit until she stopped shivering underneath him. Only when she was completely relaxed and she had closed her eyes, he placed his middle finger against her opening, gently pushing it in. Her eyes opened instantly, but by then he was already fingering her in a gentle pace, like he wanted her to feel pleasure and no pain.

'No… No…' she gasped. He chuckled.

'I did not hear you complain just before, little bird. You seemed to enjoy me rubbing you just now.' He grinned as he fingered her, watching her in her eyes the entire time. When he tried to add a finger, she winced and closed her eyes tightly.

'Hurts that much?' he asked her, halting his movements. She nodded a tear rolling from her eyes. She heard him sigh, before he removed his fingers and released her wrists. She pulled her arms to herself and tried to make herself small. He was not having any of that though. He moved around some more. Placing himself right behind her, she was not paying much attention to his actions, until she felt something probe against her backside. She froze instantly. She had thought he was stopping because he hurt her, but now he was going to rape her?

'What are you…' She sounded alarmed. Sandor shushed her and used his hands to open her legs a little, placing the tip of himself between her slippery lips. She had never been this afraid. It would hurt so much. She was sure of it. He let himself slide between her lips, just like he had done with his finger. But this time the tip of his member touched her opening and clit every now and then, making her shiver in pleasure and fear. He groaned behind her and she felt him grip himself behind her, she was waiting for him to shove himself in at any moment, but it just was not happening, she registered.

'Little bird…' He growled behind her, pumping himself fast now, still pressing the tip against her wet opening. She decided to keep as still as she could, so he would not accidentally hurt her, or press himself inside of her. He then shuddered, pressing himself even closer, the tip of his member hard against her lips. She felt warm fluids against her lips and shuddered. He had come. His seed was between her legs!

He moaned for a bit, keeping her close.

'Little bird… You did good. For now.' He kissed the back of her head and sighed in content. It only took seconds before she heard him snore behind her.


	12. Chapter 12

Sandor had no trouble sleeping that night, but she was laying awake. She felt afraid, unsure and very uncomfortable. Why was Sandor kidnapping her? He had made it very clear he wanted her completely. Why had he just went on and forced her? Maybe if he had just…. asked her out like normal people did…

She licked her lips. No, even then she would not have said yes. He was so much older, such a big man. And then his scars… They scared her now, more than they had done when she had seen him shopping in the store she worked at.

The night seemed endlessly, her tired eyes barely open. She stared at the small windows, covered by curtains. The sun was slowly breaking through. Did Sander know what he was doing to her? How it felt for her? And how much he frightened her?

She sighed and shrieked when she felt Sander pull her closer, one of his hands finding her breast.

'Are you awake already little bird?' he rasped. Sansa froze, feeling his thumb stroking her nipple slowly. She tensed, what caused her nipples to stiffen. Sander instantly noticed off course and took the hard bud between his fingers, pinching her very lightly.

'Tits to die for,' he muttered, before she felt him move a bit, taking her nipple in his mouth, licking and then suckling. Sansa balled her hands to fists, not sure how to make this stop without angering him. He let his hands move down her body, resting on her waist, keeping her still. Sansa closed her eyes and tried to blank her mind. It worked for a second, until she felt his hands lower again, this time spreading her thighs. Sansa then gripped his hands, hoping to stop him. Sandor did stop, for a minute. He watched her, his enormous body hovering over hers.

'Relax, little bird. This will not hurt.' He pushed her down and kept her legs in place with his hands. She then froze completely, feeling his mouth on her, down there. He gently licked between her legs, slow long licks, to get her used to the feeling. She squirmed in his hold, but he continued his administration's nonetheless. She felt the tip of his tongue probing her entrance, entering her easily. It felt weird, not unpleasant or painful. He then sucked on her clit, almost immediately sending her over the edge, moaning softly.

'That's a good bird.' He licked her a bit more, until she stopped convulsing. He then pulled back, moved over her again and forced a kiss on her lips.

'I'll go wash up first, and start the car.'

The hours after that mornings rendezvous were spent in silence. Sansa had cleaned herself up quite vigorously. She felt her body burn from all her brushing with a wet cloth. She sat beside Sandor, who seemed in the best mood, humming to himself. He every now and then glanced in her direction. Sansa was at loss at him and his moods. She also felt more and more nervous around him now he just touched her as he pleased. She prayed for it to end soon. Couldn't someone come and save her?

It was only at the top of a sunny hill, Sander pulled the car to the side and shut the engine off. The place seemed deserted. Probably why he had chosen to stop here.

'Let's stretch our legs for a bit, little bird.' Sansa watched him unbuckle his seatbelt before he got up and moved towards the door of the camper. Sansa felt completely exhausted as she unbuckled her belt and followed him. She watched him take the gun once more. She swallowed, feeling even more afraid.

'Come Sansa,' he said, opening the door and stepping outside. He waited for her to step out of the camper, before he closed and locked the door. She liked being outside once more. It smelt nice and the sun felt warm on her skin. She squinted her eyes against the sun and then watched Sander, how was staring at her.

'It is a short stop, but just long enough to watch the view from the top, come. No one will bothers us here.' Sansa wished someone would come and bother them. Sander pointed in the direction he wanted her to go and made her go first. Probably so he could keep an eye on her. After ten minutes he told her to stop and they stood at the top of the hill. Sansa had to admit it was a spectacular view. She could see right over a forest.

'It is beautiful,' she said softly, momentarily forgetting her sorrow. Sandor chuckled.

'It is. Like you.' She took a step away from him, feeling shy and instantly back in her sorrows and fears.

'You seem more nervous than before, little bird. Why is that?' Sansa was shocked by his direct question, but even more with him stepping closer, stopping right beside her. She bit her lip and pulled her arms around herself. What should she answer?

'Sansa?' he asked her, his tone more urgent now.

'Nothing.' He then stepped before her, his hands on her upper arms. His hold was gentle and warm, but firm enough to keep her in place.

'Do not lie to me.' She watched up, meeting his eyes.

'You would not want to hear it anyway.' He was surprised with her words, but chuckled.

'I am asking you, am I not? Now tell me.' She tried to make herself even smaller, but to no use, his hands stayed where they were.

'You. You touching me, forcing me to sleep naked and -' she really did not want to talk more about it. Not a word. But Sander chuckled, before he grinned.

'It's the thought of me fucking you that keeps you awake at night, doesn't it little bird?' She did not like his harsh words and closed her eyes.

'You'd rather have a nice prince to fuck you, hmm? Well too bad little bird, it will be me that will fuck you your first time. Not some pretty boy.' She felt a tear run down her cheek and noticed Sander released her arms.

'You better be grateful it will be me, instead of some boy who has no clue how to fuck a woman.' Sansa wiped her tears away, feeling her heart sink.

'At least I'll make sure you will enjoy it too, little bird. There is pleasure for the both of us.' Sansa was trying to not hear his words, but she could not unhear them either.

'Now, let's get back to the camper.' He motioned for her to go first again, but saw she hesitated.

'Sansa?'

'You have made it pretty clear you will rape me soon enough. But that's what it is. Rape.' He took a step closer and took her arm in hand.

'Ah but you seem to forget that rape does not involve foreplay or a very wet woman. And your cunt was very, very wet, little bird. You were very aroused.' Sansa tried to pull herself free, but his grip was too strong.

'You hurt me,' she said back. He chuckled.

'Only a little, after I have stretched you a bit, you'll like it better.' She watched him, horrified at his words.

'Now move, before I decide to make your first time an open view memory.' He released her and Sansa turned, walking back, her eyes watery and her body shaking from head to toe.

The kilometers after that little conversation had left them more silent than before. Sansa had cried a lot of silent tears, her eyes red and her head hurting. Sandor had not commented on her tears once. But he also had not teased or mocked her because of it.

'Little bird.' Sansa noticed he had parked the camper only now. She glanced in his direction.

'Look at me, Sansa.' It was the use of her name that made her do as he told her. He watched her slowly, his eyes lingering on hers quite a while before he spoke again.

'I don't want to hurt you.' She swallowed and stared at him, disbelief written all over her face. He sighed deeply.

'I am not saying I will never touch you again. I must. But I do not mean for it to hurt you.' Sansa unbuckled her belt.

'I need sleep, please.' He nodded, watching her red eyes.

'You can go and lie down, sleep, little bird. I will wake you for supper later.'


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! Thank you all so much for taking the time to leave a little something for me to read! You have no idea how that helps me get through my days! I always enjoy reading your thoughts and ideas and when I come home from a long day at work, they keep me motivated to write on and escape into my stories!
> 
> In this chapter Sandor tries to do his best.... but he just can't help, to help himself to what he wants, can he....? Do not let yourselves be misguided, Sandor will take what he want in the end!
> 
> Enjoy!

Sansa moved herself between the sheets and closed her eyes instantly. She needed to sleep. Her head was hurting, and her eyes felt like exploding. She huddled herself in the warm sheets and tried to block out all her thoughts. She wanted to clear her head and to feel like she used to feel before Sandor had taken her away.

But the sound of the engine and the feeling of the car moving was making it harder for her to pretend she was at home in her own bed. She tried counting sheep and then she decided she would just think of nothing but the colour black. 

It took her a few moments to finally slip into a deep slumber, not the colour black filling her mind, but very dark, grey eyes.

Sander watched the girl sleep after parking and hiding the car. They were getting closer towards their destination and that made him feel a little more at ease. His little bird was giving him a hard time. He wanted to be good to her, but he knew he also needed to be firm, or she would flee. He was not willing to take any chances with her. He needed her like he needed air. 

He made himself something to eat and was debating on waking her too, but he had seen the marks under her tired, red eyes. She needed sleep more than food and he wanted her to feel better. He let her sleep and even when he himself went to bed, he didn’t disturb her. She was finally sleeping peacefully, and he was glad for it. He knew it would be some time before she would come around to him, but he had no doubts that she, eventually, would. She would see he cared deeply for her, he wanted her to be safe, cared for and loved. And loving her he did, he was sure of it.

Softness and warmth. It was the first things Sansa noticed when she finally awoke from her deep sleep. For the first time in days, she felt rested and less tired. She moved a little and then froze as she found she was not alone in bed. She then realized where she was and with whom. She felt herself grow even warmer and probably red when she realized she was lying against Sandor, but he was not touching or forcing her to do so. She had nestled herself against his side, hence the warmth. She instantly moved back and with her the sheets moved too, waking Sandor. She watched him open his eyes before he stretched his arms. His grey eyes made her think back on her dreams, but she fought not to let her mind linger. She was once again very close to this enormous man that wanted more of her than she wanted to give and that kept frightening her a lot. 

‘Good morning little bird. Or perhaps afternoon, I reckon.’ His voice sounded deep and raspy. He closed his eyes for a moment, before he watched her again.

‘We slept in?’ Sansa asked him, unsure why he would have done such a thing. She knew he wanted to reach their destination desperately and he would always wake up early. So that he had not done that today was a little strange to Sansa.

Sandor just grinned.

‘You needed to sleep, and I couldn’t find it in my heart to wake you. You seemed so peaceful.’ Sansa felt herself blush even more when she saw his eyes move from hers towards her lips as his words sunk in. 

‘Why would you do that?’ She sounded completely flabbergasted that he would consider her and her feelings. Why would he? Sandor cleared his throat before he let his arm slide her way to pull her a little against his side. She instantly felt his warmth and despite she was afraid of what it was he wanted of her, she at least enjoyed that bit. 

‘I want you to feel good Sansa. Not tired and afraid all the time. Maybe it helps with all the crying too.’ Sansa had been listening carefully, not believing he seemed to care for her more than she thought, until he added that bit about her tears.

‘Well, if you hadn’t taken me, you would not have to put up with my tears.’ She was being mean, and she knew it, but the words had left her mouth before she could stop them. She saw Sandor’s eyes grew a little darker, but he only grinned wider. That was not something that made Sansa feel any better at all. If anything, he seemed more dangerous now, more predator than ever and suddenly Sansa remember with who she was lying in bed. And what this strong man could do to her if he wanted to. 

‘Oh, little bird. There will be more tears, I am sure of it. But they will be tears of pleasure I hope.’ He pulled her even closer and his lips found hers, forcing a passionate kiss from her lips. Sansa was surprised and shocked about his fast move on her, and gasped into his mouth, not understanding that she gave him all the access he could ever want. She felt his hands on her waist and neck, keeping her close, making sure he kissed her good and hard only releasing her when they both were completely out of breath. 

Sansa stared up into his grey eyes, completely dazed by what just happened. And she realized she had kissed him back. And by the way he seemed to watch her with amusement and satisfaction written all over his face, he had noticed that too.

‘You are already warming up to me little bird. I knew it.’ Sansa swallowed and felt how her lips seemed swollen from their kiss. She hated herself a little more than she hated him. What had she done? 

‘Let’s eat something before we go on, you surely need some food on you.’ 

After toast and coffee Sandor installed himself in the driver’s seat and Sansa sat down in the passenger seat beside him. They both were silent for most of the time, but something in the air had shifted and Sansa was not so sure she liked it. 

Sansa had noticed that their surroundings had changed a lot. The terrain seemed harsher, more mountains and cliffs surrounded the roads and less cars passed them. When most of the day was gone, they seemed to be the only ones on the road. That made Sansa feel afraid for what was yet to come and what liberties Sandor was planning to take with her.

‘You are allowed to speak little bird.’ Sansa noticed he seemed in a lighter mood after this morning and that made her nervous too. He liked it way too much that she had answered his kiss even if it was because he had surprised her so. His teasing words even sounded more friendly instead of mocking.

She watched him from the side and saw him glance at her, before he watched the road again. There was a small smile around his lips and Sansa wondered what he was thinking about. 

‘I have nothing to say.’ He seemed surprised she was talking back after some minutes, but her words only made him chuckle.

‘That’s a first. You usually chirp all day. What’s different now?’ Sandor was trapping her into conversation and because of his different attitude, Sansa fell for it.

‘While at work it is my duty to make people feel welcome and help them finding the groceries they need. Of course, I need to speak to people then.’ Sandor grinned and licked his lips.

‘And a fine job you did, I always felt very welcome, little bird.’ Sansa looked away, feeling her cheeks grow red at his compliment. She was not seeking for his approval, but his words did to something to her.

For a moment they were silent, until Sandor decided to ask her a more personal question.

‘Why didn’t you see your mother often?’ Sansa cocked her head to the side, watching his face for any mockery, but found none. He seemed genuinely interested in what she had to say about this. Sansa bit her lips. She had never spoken with anyone about why she had ended the relationship with her mother, and she was not really feeling like sharing the details with him.

‘We just didn’t get along anymore.’ Even she heard there was more in those words, but she hoped Sandor wouldn’t. Of course, he did.

‘I do not care for your lies, little bird. Tell me the truth.’ Sansa watched him and saw his eyes looked sharp into hers. He was not letting the subject go and she wondered why he was suddenly so interested.

‘My father died a few years back. I really got along with him. He was my greatest friend and supporter. When he died my mother was heartbroken. And I understood that. She was distancing herself from the world and everyone. I tried to help her and make everything more easy for her, but- She did not want me to help her.’  
Sander had remained perfectly silent, listening to what she was saying and what she wasn’t. 

‘She found a new man sometime later and I decided to move out to give them their space.’ Sander saw her mouth twitch when she mentioned the new man of her mothers and suddenly, he felt there really was more to this story. 

‘You must have been heartbroken too.’ Sansa had been staring at her hands now and was suddenly drawn to Sander and his words. She walled hardly. He was right, she had been heartbroken too, but there had not been any room for her to grieve for long. She had moved out because she had to, and she had to find a job to pay for her own living.

‘Yeah, I was.’ For a moment both of them were silent, their own thoughts occupying their attention, until Sandor put one and one together and needed to know more. 

‘Did you get along with that new man of your mothers?’ Sansa made the mistake to watch directly into his grey eyes and saw he suspected something was off and her face gave her away immediately. 

‘Sansa?’ He urged when she opened her mouth but stayed silent. Sansa had been so wrapped up in what she was telling his she had not even noticed he had parked the car and they were once again in the woods. Only dark surrounding them now.

‘Not really.’ He nodded once. He wanted to know more but saw she had a hard time thinking about it and even more so putting it to words. 

‘Did he touch you little bird?’ Sansa huffed and looked away. Was he seriously asking about another man trying to force himself upon her while he had done exactly the same, more even?

‘I don’t want to talk about it oke, let it go.’ She turned herself even more away from him and tensed as she heard him unbuckle his seatbelt so he could get even closer to her. She felt his fingers under her chin as he made her look up to him.

‘Your mother was wrong in not seeing your pain as well as her own Sansa. And she was wrong to let another man into her life that made you feel there was no place for you anymore.’ Sansa felt tears burn in her eyes and she hated herself for it. But even more she hated the way his words made her feel. Like he understood and he wanted her to know she had done the right thing while all she had done for years was convincing herself she was. She had worked so very hard and done everything to make a living for herself. And not once her mother had even called to check in on her.

‘Stop, you are making me cry.’ Sansa’s words were soft, and she moved her head from his fingers to look outside and hide her tears away, gazing into the dark as a tear made his way down her cheek. Sandor had told her he didn’t wanted her to cry, but this time it was his own fault. 

She felt him wipe away the lone tear, before he gripped her chin again, even more gentle this time around.

‘But now you have a very good reason to cry a few tears Sansa. You did good on your own. You stayed strong. But now I will take care of you. Of us.’ 

Sansa noticed he seemed affected by her words too. This strong man, almost too large to fit inside his own camper was telling her she had done a good job and he even meant it. 

She felt her lips tremble, but she refused another tear over her mother.

‘Thank you.’ 

Sandor nodded once and then released her chin, extending his hand for her to take.

‘Come, we will eat and then sleep, tomorrow we will head out with the first light of day.’ Sansa took his hand, too emotional to fight him in this moment. Sandor held her hand until he guided her to the bed and turned to warm some food for them. 

‘Why did you come to the store so often. That was not even the biggest or best supermarket in town, you could have gone to a better one,’ Sansa then asked him, putting her thoughts to words, again talking before thinking. Sandor turned back around, his eyes on her instantly.

‘Mayhap not, but you were working there. And not in the other supermarkets.’ Sansa felt her chest sting a bit as his eyes suddenly held so much emotion, she was afraid of it.

‘But-‘ His grin stopped her from saying more.

‘I only came there to see you, Sansa. I knew I wanted you from the first time I saw you there. You were kind to me and treated me no different from any other customer. To me that was a first.’ His words froze her. What was he actually saying? Did people treat him differently than she had? But why? 

‘What do you mean?’ He flexed his arms a bit, but his eyes never left hers.

‘I knew you noticed my scars, but you were not afraid of them. Other people are Sansa. Even now I see your eyes watch me, but your eyes never linger on my ugly side. For you the scars are just there and part of me. To others I am nothing more than the scars on my face.’ 

Sansa was confused about what he told her. Why would others treat him different because of how he looked? She was more intimidated by his voice and seize than his scars. 

‘Think on that little bird, we both are loners in this world.’ He turned back around and finished preparing their food, handing her a bowl of warmed stew and a piece of bread.

He sat down too and sighed deeply.

‘To me you were the most beautiful creature I had ever seen, and I need to see more of you than on my once-a-week shopping spree Sansa.’ She felt herself blush and placed the bowl of stew on the table.

He seemed different this night, like he wanted to build something between them. Sansa was not sure she wanted that.

‘But why did you take me, forced me to come and-‘ Sansa stopped there, before she would say things that could anger him. 

‘Would you even have considered seeing me outside of work Sansa? An older man, an ugly fucker that scares the entire town shitless?’ He looked questioningly at her, with a judgmental look in his eyes. He was right somehow, Sansa knew. She had always thought of him as a nice, tall man, but she was also a little nervous because of his deep voice and sharp eyes. He always seemed to see everything and always managed to walk into an aisle at just the right time to meet her.

‘Exactly,’ he said, taking a spoonful of stew. Sansa licked her dry lips.

‘But forcing me to be here and to touch me-‘ He looked up, meeting her eyes with such a ferocity she froze completely. 

She knew she was now broaching a sensitive topic, but she also wanted to make this a topic of discussion. He really seemed to be doing his best tonight to get to know her and tell her about herself to name this. Maybe he would see that he was wrong?

‘You force me to do things I don't want. I don't need a handsome prince. But I want someone I can trust and someone who loves me. I don't want to be forced into anything.’ She had looked away at speaking and now felt so nervous about what he would do or say. His silence was almost more deafening than his words could ever been. 

When she finally found the courage to look up, she saw that he had put down his bowl and was staring at her with a struggle on his face.

‘Maybe I scared you. But I do love you Sansa. You are so careful. So protective of yourself. You deserve to be loved properly.’ 

She saw he meant every word and that frightened her a lot. Was he crazy or just really determined to have her all to himself? 

‘I don’t want to be raped.’ 

Sansa saw a throbbing vein in his neck and wondered if she had gone too far now. Would he explode and get angry? He cleared his throat, then picked up his bowl again. Sansa felt that the moment of honesty and rapprochement was over.

‘When I deflower you, it won't be rape. Believe me.’


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I just seem to have tons of inspiration. I have been writing this fresh out of work, enjoying the company of my pets and occasionally staring outside, watching the snow slowly melt away. I can tell you it was a wonderful afternoon! I hope you enjoy!
> 
> *pure smut ahead!

Sandor’s words kept playing in her head. 

"When I deflower you, it won't be rape. Believe me."

Sansa imagined him pinning her down while he shove himself into her quite forcefully. It was that image in her head that kept her eyes open and her heart beating faster than it should while lying in bed. 

For a moment she had believed he had tried to get closer to her and even that he tried to be open with her. He even seemed to regret some things, but that moment had been short lived, Sansa now knew. 

Maybe he did feel sorry for her sometimes, but she also knew the dark look he could get in his eyes and that when that happened there was no stopping him, not even if she begged or cried. 

She felt him move himself even closer towards her. Tonight, he was not granting her any space. She felt the hairs on his chest against her back, because he had insisted, she’d not wear more than panties to bed. And the dark look in his eyes had made her do as he asked without questioning or talking back. He had one arm around her, possessively placed over her breast. She shivered a bit, thinking about what he could do to her tonight, or the next morning, what made Sandor pull her even closer to his chest, his warm body flush against her. She felt him move one muscular thigh between her legs, forcing her legs apart. She couldn’t disagree with the fact he was indeed very warm, but he was also invading her space so much more than she was used to or comfortable with. 

‘I’ll keep you warm, little bird,’ he rasped, his voice betraying he was almost sleeping. 

His skin against hers made her feel even more self-aware. His leg was twice the size of hers. She froze. Comparing her frame next to his was not helping her feel any better, she knew. She shivered some more, despite the human heater that was lying against her back. Her mind was working overtime once again, and she hated she just wasn’t able to fall asleep as easily as he could. 

‘Still cold, hmm?’ She tensed up, taken aback by the fact he was awake enough to ask her this. She felt him turn her in his arms, hoovering over her in seconds, forcing her on her back. His grey eyes found hers quickly, his hand moving some hair behind her ear. 

‘Or are you worrying yourself sick again, perhaps?’ His voice sounded even deeper in the dark and so close to sleep. He sounded like a wolf, his voice raspy and harsh. His eyes seemed warm enough though. 

‘Just can’t sleep.’ She forced herself to answer him, bringing her arms around her chest to shield her bare breasts from his view, what earned her a chuckle and a crooked grin. He teasingly moved his fingers over her arm, moving closer and closer towards her breasts. She held her breath, her eyes no longer on his, but on his hand that was moving so very close towards her chest. 

‘You should sleep, you barely caught up on sleep today. Don't make it harder for yourself than it has to be, Sansa.’ At hearing those words, she looked up to meet his eyes. She was surprised to see him look at her still, his fingers frozen on her hand, but not touching her breast yet. 

‘I am not doing it on purpose,’ she snapped back, instantly regretting using that tone with him being so close and hoovering over her. 

‘ Oh, the little bird clearly has a sharp beak on her, that’s for sure. But, she is and remains scared, aren’t ya little bird.’ He moved closer towards her and kissed her naked shoulder. He slowly, almost lazily kissed his way to her arms then, to make his way over towards her hands that still lay protectively over her breasts. He then softly bit the skin of her breast she could not cover and grinned as he heard her gasp. 

‘You like that, don’t you little bird?’ he wasted no time waiting for her reply, he took one of her arms in hand and released her hold on her breast. He moved instantly and brought his lips over her pink nipple, sucking the bud in his mouth, suckling firmly. She gasped louder and brought both her hands on his shoulders to push him away, but he was unmovable. She tensed as she realised, he was really not moving away, a rock figure in the same bed as her, his mouth now sucking her nipple a little gentler. She closed her eyes and tried to think of anything else but what was happening to her, but his hand making its way down her belly brought her back to reality. He easily slipped his fingers inside her panties, to rub the little bud he found there too.

‘No please, I’ll go to sleep. Really!’ She pleaded, once again trying to push him away, but he was not having any of that. He let his middle finger slide between her folds a few times, chuckling when he felt her become a little wet at his touch.

‘Relax Sansa.’ He could tell her all day to relax, but she knew she would never when he was touching her like he did.

He moved his mouth to her neck and kissed her just below her ear, sending goosebumps all over her body. His rough beard was scarping against her skin and that made her arch into his touch that little bit more. She felt him grin against her skin and then push his middle finger inside of her. She released her grip on his shoulder and instead balled her fists and pressed them against his naked torso.

‘You are tensing up little bird. That why it feels uncomfortable for you. Relax.’ He fingered her slowly, his pace slower than the other times he had touched her there. She felt his thumb against her clit, rubbing circles lazily on her most sensitive part. She bit her lip and hated herself for enjoying his touch now. She only registered he was speeding up his face when he added another finger and was now pushing in two fingers instead of one.

She winced for he had quite large digits and it was not feeling that wonderful anymore. She felt a tear leave her eye, thinking about his even thicker manhood. She had seen it and felt it and she knew she never wanted that inside of her.

‘Come for me little bird. Come around these two fingers and were done for tonight.’ He pushed them deep inside of her, curling them, making Sansa arch her back of the bed, enabling him to move them even deeper into her heat. 

He smiled feeling how wet she was now. She was very tight, but his two fingers now went easily inside of her. 

‘I don’t want to come,’ she breathed. He chuckled and moved his lips next to her ear.

‘Liar. You know you do. Come for me little bird. Milk my fingers like we both know you can.’ He rubbed her clit a little firmer now, making her gasp loudly. His raspy chuckle filled the air as he felt her contract her muscles around his fingers. He slowly his pace just a little, but he rubbed her even firmer. She arched her back even more and gasped loudly as she came. He kissed her jaw, before he kissed her lips, all the while pumping his fingers in and out of her tight warmth.

‘Good bird. Fuck, you are really tight.’ 

It was then he pulled his hand back and moved himself to lie between her legs fully and she felt his enormous, rock hard manhood press against her crotch. He was so close now, keeping her in his arms with no way out. Only her panties and his boxershorts were between him slipping himself inside of her and that thought frightened her beyond belief. But when he moved and rubbed himself on her, she gasped loudly. That was for sure something she had not expected him to do. She was so sensitive now and felt tired. She tried to move way when he rubbed himself harder against her. Her clit was on fire and she wanted to get away from his hard, warm weapon, that seemed so ready and eager to claim her. 

‘You are so wet little bird. So ready to be stretched a little more.’ She froze. He was going to rape her, she just knew it.

‘No- you said it wouldn’t be rape. Please.’ She felt tears leave her eyes at the image of him forcing his enormous manhood inside of her until she bled. 

He felt is lips on her ear and her neck, kissing and biting her, tracing a trail down to her breasts, sucking a nipple inside of his mouth, to suckle on it. She kept her eyes closed firmly and prayed he would end this here. She was not ready for him to take her innocence away. She would hate him forever if he did that.

‘Stop- please. Stop!’ He rubbed himself a little harder against her hearing her words.

‘You are mine to do with as I please, little bird. Do not forget that.’ The tone he used froze her heart and she now knew he would not stop things here tonight. Her heart broke thinking about the pain she would feel.

Sandor then moved himself away from her, making Sansa open her eyes and sigh in relieve. But unfortunately for Sansa it was only a short-lived reprieve. He took his boxers of and instantly his big, thick manhood sprung to attention. It seemed even bigger than she remembered and she tried to get away when Sandor reached for her panties. He was not letting her go so easily this time, pulling her panties clean off of her before he placed himself between her legs again, keeping her in his arms. He brough the tip of his member against her tight opening and let himself coat in her juices. His broad thighs forced her legs open wide enough so he could move between her legs easily. She felt the big head of his cock move inside just the smallest bit and she whimpered. Even that was uncomfortable. 

‘It will only hurt a little, only this once.’ She heard he tried to think about her comfort, but he sounded so hoarse and excited she was afraid of everything he was about to do to her. He pushed himself onto his elbows and pulled his member back a little to slide back between her lips.

‘Relax Sansa. It will fit. You won’t get hurt.’ She opened her eyes and watched his. There was pure lust written all over his face and she just knew she was lost. Completely lost. 

‘It did hurt!’ she protested. He kissed her cheek before pushing himself against her opening once more, silencing her effectively. 

‘Only this first time, little bird. Relax your muscles.’ He pressed on, but it was not that easy to force himself inside of her. He felt her muscles and her tensed body beneath him. He went to tease her clit again and tried to enter her with a finger again, feeling even that was not going smoothly.

‘Little bird, open yourself up.’ He forced his finger inside this time, feeling her tight muscles instantly trying to move him out of her. She cried softly and winced louder when he added a finger.

‘Sansa,’ he warned, but she just couldn’t do it. She had clenched her jaw shut and seemed in such distress that Sandor removed his manhood from her. 

‘On your knees,’ he commanded her. He saw her tear-streaked face, and felt a pang in his chest, but he needed more than before. She would never open herself up willingly, he knew. For her fear was too great. And not only of him, but everything about intimacy. 

He was surprised to see her comply as fast as she did. She turned on her knees and let him move her, so her backside was facing him. He let his warm hands roam her cheeks, before he let his finger slip between her pussy lips. She was swollen and wet, but still so fucking tight. She had the most beautify pink folds, he noticed. He felt his cock twitch at seeing that. He removed his finger and then brought his mouth towards her slit, licking her firmly, and entering her with his tongue as deep as he could. He forced her legs even wider what gave him better access to everything. He rubbed her clit too and ignored her whimpers about it being too much. Within moments he felt her contract around his tongue. He removed his finger and licked her clit until she came down from her high and collapsed on the bed.

He let her lie down as he moved her hair from her back and kissed her neck.

‘Now make sure you are asleep when I get back, or I will open you up.’ He moved off of the bed and covered her with the sheets. He would take care of himself tonight, but soon he would fuck that tight pussy, even if it meant he would have to force himself in with force.


	15. Chapter 15

They continued their journey in silence. Even Sandor did not ask her a single question as even she kept silent. He'd given her breakfast very early in the morning and then started the car to continue the road ahead.

Sansa blamed him for what had happened last night, but most of all she was very shocked. This man was much more dangerous than she thought. It was scary to think how she sometimes forgot who she was dealing with. He could be so nice one minute and ask so many of her in the next. Her head was spinning, and all her muscles ached from being constantly alert and scared.

Yesterday she really thought he was going to rape her. He had gone very far, yet he hadn't finished it. She swallowed hard, wondering why he hadn't raped her when he had the chance.

It was even more difficult to figure out how to proceed from here on out. He was taking her somewhere, but what would happen if they were there? Was he going to lock her up and touch her every now and then?

Was it a house, a cave or another camper he had in mind? Why did he take her so far from where he and she used to live? Why was this other place so important to him?

Sansa saw the mountains and knew they must be somewhere north. She gambled on Scotland but did not dare to ask Sandor anything anymore.

She saw him look at her every now and then, but he didn't speak at all. He occasionally growled something to himself, but there was not much sound in the car to be heard.

When it started to rain softly and then more and more, Sansa leaned her head against the window and examined the droplets on the window. They slowly trickled down. A sight to behold, almost as sad as she felt right now.

She also felt that she was empty inside. She was tired, a little cold, and hungry. But no hair on her head thought of sharing this with her kidnapper.

It was not until a few hours later that he cleared his throat that Sansa was startled from her thoughts.

‘I can hear your teeth rattle from over here, little bird.’

She was amazed at how friendly he sounded. Still, she didn't look up. It wasn't until she felt a soft blanket slip over her that she looked his way. He had apparently stopped the car and got the blanket for her.

‘It's only a short drive now. Tonight, you will sleep in a large, comfortable bed, little bird. Just like you deserve.’

Sansa listened to his words but couldn't shake the thought of him sleeping in that bed too.

A few hours later, when it was pitch dark and they hadn't met anyone for half the day, Sandor parked the car in a forest and told her to get out. He grabbed some things, handed her, her coat, and stepped out into the woods.

Sansa followed him obediently. Her legs were stiff from sitting still for a long time, but she stayed close to him, more afraid of the dark and the inhabitants of this forest than of him. He took her to a bank where a reasonable dinghy was moored.

‘We are crossing water?’ She asked more frightened than she intended. Sandor glanced at her for a moment and nodded.

‘It will only take half an hour. Come on, get in.’

Sandor was right. It was a short half hour by boat before she saw a small island. Fear hit her hard. He really planned on setting them apart from the rest of the world. Who would ever find her here?

Nature seemed even rougher on the island than on the mainland. They had to walk a little longer until a small, cosy house appeared. It was somewhat hidden behind a cliff and trees. But it looked comfortable enough.

Sandor paused and turned to face her.

‘Welcome home Sansa.’

Walking through the house Sansa learned Sandor was a practical man. The house was built some decades ago. And Sandor had renovated the house. There was a humble kitchen, warm living room with fireplace and in the back, there was a large bathroom, with a bathroom with tub and shower. Most of the furniture was made out of dark wood. The bed was immense, big enough for Sandor, Sansa and a few more people if necessary.

Sansa was a little relieved, knowing she could escape to one side of the bed without even having to touch him. The bed was made for someone as large as Sandor, Sansa reckoned.

‘You can freshen up in the bathroom, I’ll prepare us dinner.’ Sandor brushed against her arm softly, before he went to the kitchen, leaving her in the bedroom.

Sansa walked into the bathroom, seeing there was a porcelain tub and sink. It looked pretty old fashioned, but cute in a way. From a window she saw there was a shed outside and a lot of chopped wood. How long ago had Sandor been here?  
Sansa washed up quickly and combed her fingers through her hair, before she braided her red locks and walked out of the bathroom. She only hoped Sandor was in his good mood still. She prayed silently to every god that would want to listen.

Sandor had warmed up some soup again, with a little bread. He looked up as she walked into the kitchen and she thought she saw the corner of his mouth go up just a little bit, but she wasn’t entirely sure.

‘Tomorrow I will set some traps for future dinners. Tonight, this will have to do. Come and sit, Sansa.’

Hours later Sansa sat on the floor, in front of the fireplace, while Sandor sat on a chair, drinking some whiskey while watching down on her. They had not spoken a lot in the past few hours, and the tension was clear in the air.

‘Are you feeling alright, little bird?’ She was not sure if he was irritated or happy with her right now. His tone was flat, empty. She wondered why. Could he see she was still upset and angry with him?

‘I’m fine.’ He cleared his throat when that was all she was answering him with.

‘I love you Sansa.’ For a moment she froze, not sure if she had heard him right or if it was the alcohol speaking but she felt anger boil up within her so strongly, she could do nothing but snap.

‘If you loved me truly you would not force me into things, I am not ready for!’ His look turned darker at hearing her words. Her anger was great enough to match his and she saw he was trying to keep his words in and not take her bait, but he was only a man. And a very rough one at that.

‘Me stopping where I did, not even breaking you in yet, should tell you how I feel about you, Sansa. Me not fucking you raw when I so easily could have should be enough for you. I held back. I do not hold back for anyone.’ His grey eyes had the strength of a storm. His jaw was tense as he stared at her.

Sansa felt tears burn behind her eyes as she moved to stand, but before she could leave the room, he stood, and his hands caught her. He forced her to stand still before him, her watery eyes looking into his. She wanted nothing more than to flee or turn invisible. But of course, she had no such luck.

‘There’s no running from me here Sansa. You need me.’ He had adjusted his tone a bit, she heard, but she saw little as tears leaked from her eyes.

‘I need to be alone for a moment. Please.’ She tried to walk away, but he wouldn’t let her.

‘You can have a moment. In here. With me. No hiding from me little bird.’ He gave her a stern look, but then released her, watching how she turned into a corner near the window and stared outside.

The silence hung heavy in the air and Sansa wondered how she would survive from now on out, with apparently no one else on this island. She watched Sandor drink down his second glass of whiskey whereafter he cleared his throat. She braced herself for the worst.

‘I will not force you anymore Sansa.’ She turned her head and just knew she had to be hearing this wrong. Or maybe she was just pretending to hear things now.

His eyes found hers and she was shocked to see the intensity of his gaze.

‘Don’t get me wrong. You will not deny me your company or warmth at night. But I will not force you to lie with me if it disgusts you so.’ She saw the pained look in his eyes. What had happened to this man that he thought himself such a monster? Yes, his actions had been those of a monster. But before he had taken her, she had thought of him like a nice, gentle giant. One who always smiled at her and made her feel like she was doing a good job.

‘What do you-‘ him placing his glass quite forcefully on the table made her shut up instantly.

‘Just as I said little bird. Maybe you will learn to love me back. Maybe you don’t.’ She was dumfounded and just stared at him. She placed her arms around herself as if to shield herself away from him.

‘A year.’ She was not sure he spoke or growled those words. What was he saying?

He stood and walked over towards her. He stopped only when he stood right before her, his enormous body so much larger than hers.

‘One year, little bird. If you can’t learn to feel anything for this ugly monster by then, I will set you free.’ Sansa felt her heart flutter swiftly in her chest. Was he being true?

‘What?’ she gasped. He took an escaped lock of hair and tucked it behind her ear before he lifted her chin with his fingers.

‘One year Sansa. That’s all I will ask of you.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo Sandor is getting a little unsure of his actions it seems…. Well maybe a different approach would do you good, you old hound!
> 
> I have such an amazing idea for another SanSan story! Maybe I will start that this weekend. Of course, I will continue this one too! I already have ideas how things will progress from here on out! I hope you will enjoy and keep hanging on!


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A remote island somewhere around the west coast of Scotland. A beautiful red bird and a lonely, rough dog.... Whatever could go wrong.... or right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here I am, back with more! Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review!
> 
> I have to get all of my wisdom teeth removed the day after tomorrow, they have been bothering me for a while now, but I was too much of a chicken to make the appointment and rather I’d just take the pain LOL, and now I am screwed…. I am dreading it so much…. 
> 
> So, what can I better do than try and take my mind off of things thinking about my stories and writing! (the good part is I will be at least 2 days off of work because of it…. So, I hope I will feel good enough to write in that time)
> 
> *Who am I kidding, scared to death guys…. Send help!*
> 
> Enjoy!

Their conversation had ended after Sandor's declaration of love. He had looked at her lips hungrily, but he hadn't kissed her. He had poured himself another glass of whiskey and drank it in his chair, staring at the fireplace.

Sansa wondered if he was really not going to force her to do anything anymore. She could hardly imagine it.

She also realized that she was here on a rugged and wild island. She could hardly imagine that other people also lived here or passed by often. It was isolated. She was trapped, even if he didn't lock her up in the house, she had nowhere to run to.

He said she needed him and that was true. She knew nothing about wilderness survival, hunting, or gathering food. She was completely and utterly dependent on him. And that thought scared her more than she was ready to admit.

Sandor seemed more distance than she had even seen him. He was not even looking at her anymore and even though that was what she had originally wanted, it now made her feel lost and wary.

_He said he loved me… How could that be? He doesn’t even know me!_

Sansa was confused and afraid of everything that might happen to her here, completely at the mercy of a man who had proven to be capable of kidnapping her. He had touched her on places no other had ever done. And how much she hated to admit it, he had awoken feelings she had never been aware of. But she was not sure she had wanted that. Not like this and not with him. Not while she was being stolen away from her own life. One she had been building up, brick by brick, fighting every odd against her on the way. And he had just taken her from all of that hard work she had been doing…

‘Time for bed, little bird.’ It was the first time in what felt like hours since he looked at her. Sansa met his eyes and was a little shocked to see not hunger or lust there, but acceptance and maybe even a tad of sadness. But just like that, he recovered and stood from his chair.

She silently followed him. She was tired and completely worn out from the journey and the emotions she had felt. She was not feeling like fighting him anymore and she hoped he would stay true to his word and not force her anymore.

He led her to the bedroom with the big bed and soft blankets on it. He stepped aside so she could pass him and walk in.

‘You go ahead and sleep, little bird. I’ll join you later.’ He watched as she sat down on the bed. It was as if he was going to say something more, but he just stared at her and then turned, leaving her alone on the big, wooden bed.

Sansa felt like if she would go crazy if she didn’t sleep anytime soon. Her mind was working so hard and her head was starting to hurt. She undressed herself until she was clothed in nothing more than a blouse and underwear. She folder her jeans and sweater and placed them neatly on the only chair in the room. She climbed into the bed and made sure she was completely covered by the sheets that felt so very soft and warm.

The house seemed old, but Sandor had tried his best to make it comfortable she reckoned. She could hear the wind howling around the house as rain came down on the window. Sansa’s knowledge on Scotland was limited, but she had heard about the weather. Four seasons in a day was not uncommon here, she knew. She nestled herself even more under the blankets and easily drifted off into a deep slumber, the howling wind helping her soothingly.

* * *

Stretching herself a little bit, Sansa’s mind was empty as she woke. She felt warm and for the first time in a long time she had nothing on her mind. That bliss lasted for a few more seconds, until she realised, she was not completely without worry at all. She felt a heavy arm on her waist, the big, warm hand of her captor resting just beneath her breasts. His body was so close to hers, despite the enormous bed. His legs rested against hers, his chest against her back.

Sansa’s eyes grew wide but swiftly tried to calm herself, seeing she was still in her blouse and he had not taken her underwear off. He was even dressed in a t shirt himself. Sansa sighed in relief and bit her lip. He was still fast asleep, his breathing ever so even. He radiated a warmth that was comparable to the fireplace Sansa loved the sit in front of. And how much she wanted to hate him for everything he had done and was, she loved the fact he was so warm.

His tall, strong body had only made her afraid of him until now, but she could imagine how nice it could be to have someone like that who cared for you and loved you. Someone who really wanted you and chose you.

Just not like this. Not like a captive little bird.

His words were racing in her head.

_A year._

Would he really keep her here for a year and then, if she still didn't want anything from him, bring her back? Let her go?

She had to admit that her heart was leaping, thinking about her freedom.

She was lost in thoughts and hopes as she felt Sandor stir behind her. He was waking up. The hand beneath her breasts moved against her chest, as he woke and in reflex pulled her even tighter against him. She felt his naked legs against her, what froze her up. It was as if that was Sandor’s cue to acknowledge her.

‘Good morning, little bird.’ He kept her in his arms a few seconds longer, his face burrowed in her hair, before he released her and rolled on his back. Sansa was glad for the distance he was providing, and for the fact he was not taking advantage of her body so close to his.

But she also instantly missed the heat he had been providing, she turned on her other side, leaving space between them. She saw he had his eyes closed still and placed his arms behind his head.

Even lying in bed like that, he looked huge. And so muscular. Sansa saw his muscular bare arms and the tightness of the shirt around his chest. She hated to stare, but he seemed glorious in the morning light. Why had he not tried to talk to her and asked her out like normal people would.

Would she have said yes? She was not sure what she would have done, to be honest. But she would never have been rude, she knew. She might have given him a fair chance, because she had though him nice, even if his enormous presence scared her.

‘Slept well then?’ His voice was so hoarse this early in the morning, it sounded like a deep growl.

Sansa answered with a small yes, at which she saw he opened his eyes and stared at her and the distance she had placed between them. She shivered, feeling the cold of this unslept bit of the bed against her skin, as his eyes devoured her.

‘Lost your words already?’ his mockery was not paining her like it usually did. He had made her even more confused with his new behaviour and she was not sure she liked this better. His behaviour put her off balance and that made her insecure. He chuckled, before he stepped from the bed suddenly, leaving her alone underneath the sheets.

‘Time for breakfast, little bird, maybe that will help you find your tongue.’ Sansa could not help but watch him walk around the bed. He was wearing a white t shirt and black boxers and everything that did for him was making his muscles even more visible. When he took the shirt off and Sansa saw his abs, she turned her gaze away. She did not want him to catch her staring. But she was a little shocked at what her mind was making her feel, seeing him move around her in the room.

He got dressed easily enough, wearing dark jeans and a lumbers blouse. It suited him so well, Sansa could not help but think he was feeling more at home here than any other place he had been. This was his safe place. He felt like he belonged her. It made him act different too. When he left her alone in the bedroom, Sansa got dressed too. She chose a warm sweater and her jeans.

Within minutes the fresh smell of coffee hit the air and Sansa only needed to follow the scent to find the kitchen. Sander was placing eggs and bacon on the counter, adding some bread.

‘Coffee and eggs good enough for you this morning?’ he watched her, and Sansa noticed how his eyes followed every curve her sweater provided, before he locked eyes with her. She nodded. His words might sound harsh, his tone wasn’t, not at all.

‘Yes please.’ He smiled, apparently liking her chirpings better than her silence. He was not scolding her on her neat behaviour at least. That was something. She saw his jaw seemed a little less tensed than other times. He almost seemed relaxed. He was in his element. He baked the food and handed her a full plate with two slices of bread, eggs and bacon on it. Sansa felt her stomach growl in anticipation. She was hungry.

‘Thank you.’ His eyes met hers for a moment and she recognized the start of what could have been a smile, before he turned to get his own plate. They ate in silence, but Sansa was otherwise occupied, eyeing everything in the cabin. In the broad daylight everything seemed different from the night before and she was amazed at how nice and cosy everything seemed.

‘You made all this yourself?’ she then could not help but ask. She saw him look at her like he saw her for the first time, before he took a sip from his coffee and opened his mouth.

‘I restored it to it’s original form. The skeleton of this house was already here.’ Sansa stared at the man before her. He was capable of doing something like this and thought he did not have a place in the world, that people would not appreciate him? Why?

‘It’s beautiful.’ His face didn’t give away what he thought about her praise, but after a few seconds he nodded.

‘I like it too. It’s home, to me.’ Sansa felt the meaning behind his words and quickly adverted her gaze.

‘There are no other people living on this island. That means we are alone, and nobody will disturb us.’ Sansa did look up at his words. The words he could have used to scare her with, now only sounded as a confirmation of a fact.

‘It also means we have to be careful, little bird. Help is hours away too. There is enough food to lasts us for months and months. But if one of us gets injured it will be hard to get help easily.’

Sansa then understood what he was trying to do, educating her about this solitary life. She nodded. He chewed his lip.

‘You already figured where we are, right?’ Sansa nodded, but he waited.

‘Scotland?’ He nodded and smiled a little. For someone who had not wanted to tell her where they were going, he seemed to like the fact she had guessed it right.

‘Aye, bonny Scotland. With rain, wind and high cliffs. I will not lock you away. But you do need to stay close to the house. If you want to explore, you can, but with me. Do you understand?’ Sansa nodded, not finding the prospect of falling off a cliff appealing in any situation, not even to get away.

‘Then that’s a deal.’ They both finished their breakfast. Sansa hated the tension that seemed to be there in the air and stood to clear away the plates and coffee cups. She could just feel his eyes on her as she moved, and she tried her hardest to not lock eyes with him. That became a little harder when he stood and towered over her.

‘What do you expect me to do here?’ Sansa saw he was close, and he had not expected her question. He thought her words over and then slowly brought his hands down to rest on her upper arms. She instantly felt the warmth of his hands go through her sweater. The warmth was nice, the tension his closeness provided not so much.

‘Adapt. Enjoy the environment, your freedom. You may learn some things that you would never have learned elsewhere.’ Sansa was completely flabbergasted as she had expected him to name some chores or something. But she had not expected him to tell her this. Was he not asking her to clean or cook or something?

He grinned at her astonishment as he stroked her arms.

What was going on in his mind?


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sansa will find out if there is a softer side to this gruff and scary Sandor....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello loves! I am still alive! The procedure was not nice, and it was a bit painful, but luckily it went well! Yesterday I could only sleep and not do anything other, not even eat. So, I am on a high level of painkillers and still not eating much, but I am feeling like writing! So here you go. I hope you enjoy! Writing this helped me get my mind off of things for a bit.

With those words he left her to herself and he turned, taking his coat, before heading outside. She watched him go and wondered what he was going to do outside this early in the morning. The wind was still howling pretty loudly, meaning it was still not very warm outside.

Sansa walked over towards the window and stared outside, seeing Sander gather some wood. He placed the chopped logs in some sort of crate. She hastily turned away when she saw he was coming back towards the house. Within seconds she heard the door open and watched him walk back in, placing the crate near the fire place.

He noticed her instantly, his eyes glued to her form, before he went on and placed the wood beside the fireplace. Sansa watched his strong arms moving ever so lightly, as if the wood was not weighing a thing.

It was unnerving and a little unsettling to see how strong he actually was. He turned again and his eyes locked on hers. She suddenly felt uncomfortable, as if she was standing there doing a little bit of nothing. She opened her mouth to speak but failed to and closed it again.

‘I'm going- I'm going to make the bed.’ She could just see some amusement in his eyes before she hurried away.

* * *

After she had made the bed, she sat on it for a moment and looked out the window.

She couldn't help but admit that Scotland was beautiful. The rugged nature enclosed the house, and it was a relaxing picture. Everywhere she looked was green, or blue from the waters. It was stunning.

Of course, she wouldn't want to just wander around outside on her own, but maybe walking outside would have been nice. Maybe Sandor would take her outside, like he had said. Maybe not so soon after they had gotten here. She wondered what he would be doing during the days here. He made sure there was food and warmth, but there was more time in a day, right?

Actually, she had no clue what he would do to pass the time here. Had he really lived her alone before? Wasn’t that really lonely? He said he preferred to be alone, but could someone really like being alone so much?

In the afternoon he prepared sandwiches and called her downstairs. He put a plate in front of her with a good pile of bread and started his own plate. She saw he used chicken, honey mustard sauce and lettuce. Not bad at all.

Sansa wasn't really hungry, but she did eat. They ate in silence for the most part, Sandor finished his bread in no time, Sansa took much longer. Mostly because she was busy about thinking about everything instead living in the moment.

‘Aren't you hungry?’ His sharp question was genuine and woke her up from her thoughts, though his voice made her look startled. She shook her head quickly and took another small bite.

He sighed.

‘We can go for a walk this afternoon, if you want. I think it will remain dry.’ Sansa almost choked on her bread, was he really asking her, instead of ordering her?

‘I think I'd rather stay indoors today.’ He looked at her with narrowed eyes, not truly satisfied with her answer. He seemed to wonder why she refused, but he didn't scold her.

‘Whatever you want, I'm outside.’

With those words he got up and left her alone in the kitchen. Sansa got up and cleared the table and washed the dishes. Maybe he had tried to be nice and to get her to settle in more in her new surroundings. But she just was not buying his nice words so easily after everything that had happened. That he had asked her to go with him instead of forcing her was something new… What had made him change his way? And then the disbelief in his eyes. A few days ago, he would have been really upset and angry with her refusing him, but now he just let her be.

Hadn’t she angered him already with her words?

* * *

It was early in the afternoon. She had not seen Sandor inside again after their lunch and his offer to go on a walk had been denied by her. She had been feeling a bit rickety all day. Still, she didn't feel really sick. Until she went to the toilet and saw exactly why she was feeling a little out of the blue.

‘Shit. Shit!’

She quickly grabbed some toilet paper and made it into a thick package to put in her underwear. She wasn't bleeding very much yet, but she it was her time of the month again.

She felt the cramp in her stomach and panicked about what to do next. She did not bring sanitary towels or other products. Would he have brought that? And how on earth was she going to ask him that?

She felt her heart sink as she washed her hands and walked out of the toilet.

She was shocked to see him inside, she had never heard him coming in. He sat down by the fireplace. He looked up as she came into the room, his eyes instantly locking on hers.

‘What’s wrong?’ His question was direct, and he did not beat around the bush. Sansa was a little startled by his directness and the intensity in his eyes.

‘No-nothing.’ He raised his brows. He was not buying her lie.

‘Don’t lie to me girl. What is wrong with you?’ He stood when Sansa was not replying, making her take a step back as he came closer.

‘Are you sick?’ he asked. Sansa wondered why he would think that, but then she remembered she was clutching her stomach with one hand. She swallowed hardly and took another step back.

‘No not sick.’ He gave her a questioning look and she could tell he was not liking the game she was trying to make him play.

‘Sansa-‘ There was a warning in his voice. He took another step closer to her and raised her chin with his fingers.

‘It’s stupid, really.’ He stared at her in bewilderment. He was obviously waiting for a reply. One she hated to give. But she needed some things to make this coming few days a little more comfortable for her.

‘Just- women trouble. You know…’ He looked at her puzzled for a moment, until the penny dropped.

‘Oh,’ he said, letting go of her chin, but he stayed close. She saw that she hadn't scared him off with her words. He seemed to be thinking deeply.

'Wait here.' He then turned and walked upstairs. She heard him rumbling about and when he walked back into the room, he had an armful of articles.

‘I bought this because ... I knew this could happen. I hope it is enough. I also have painkillers if you want them.’

Sansa shook her head quickly, though she still kept an arm around her waist. She usually had a bad first day of her period. And she hated that today was that day.

‘You sure?’ he asked her, watching her arm around her waist, before he locked eyes with her again. Sansa nodded.

‘I am going to shower and lie down for a while, I think. I’ll feel better after that.’ Sandor kept looking at her with worry in his eyes, but he nodded. She took the articles from him, muttering a soft thank you, before turning, glad she could run and flee into the bedroom and be alone for a little while.

She hated talking about her period with anyone, but she felt even more embarrassed to talk about it with him.

* * *

The shower made her feel a little better and now that she had proper sanitary towels, she felt a bit better lying in bed. Her stomach was killing her, and she felt a headache come up, but she would sit it out.

She tossed and turned and eventually rolled herself up to a small ball, moving herself back and forth slightly to ease the pain. It was so annoying and stupid, but she didn’t know any better she felt like this every month. Back at home she would boil some water and make a bottle of hot water, helping with the pain in her stomach.

She was not going to ask him if he had something like that. She would wait, if only she could fall asleep, she would feel so much better in a few hours from now…

‘You alright?’ Sansa had almost drifted off to sleep, but not successfully so as she heard his deep voice rasp from beside her. She was still lying on the bed, fully dressed and still clutching her belly. She opened her eyes for a bit, seeing him kneeling down beside her side of the bed, so his eyes were on level with hers.

He placed on hand on the bed, his eyes watching the hand on her stomach, before they locked on hers.

Sansa nodded, but he did not seem to believe her. He tilted his head a little.

‘Shall I retrieve the painkillers then?’ Sansa shook her head and closed her eyes again.

‘It will pass later.’

She heard him sigh in irritation and wondered why he was so worried about something as silly as her period.

‘Stubborn little bird,’ He grumbled at her, but she heard him get up and leave. Or so she thought. She felt the bed collapse slightly as he lay behind her.

He put his arm over her waist and pulled her close. His much bigger hand found hers, and he put his just below hers.

His warm, large hand was pleasant, and warmed the skin of her belly through her sweater.

‘You don't have to–‘ tried Sansa, but in response he pulled her closer to him. He flattened his big hand over almost all of her stomach, which actually felt really nice and warm. It did ease the pain.

‘Try to sleep, little bird.’

Sansa swallowed, wondering what exactly was happening here. Did he lie with her because he wanted to reduce her pain? Or did he just want to keep an eye on her?

Her head was dizzy, and she really tried to sleep, but it was quite difficult knowing that he was lying so close to her.

Even with all his clothes on, he was intimidating. She felt his strong thighs resting against hers and his chest rested like a block of concrete against her back.

In another life, she might have felt super safe. He was warm, tall, and strong, and he seemed really concerned about her.

When was the last time someone really wanted to know how she was doing?

He just poked through all her lies, as if he could read her mind. He had scared her with his touches and dominance, even though those days seemed so long ago.

Not in a thousand years would she have thought he could be so caring.

She hadn't asked him for anything and had slipped away to the bedroom. And yet he had come to see her. Although she didn't want to, she had to admit that it was actually very sweet and caring of him.

Which man worried about a woman's monthly troubles?

She shook a little and felt him flatten his hand a little more on her stomach.

She felt his breathing slow down. His chest moved evenly up and down against her back.

Actually, he was a really nice, warm distraction from her stomach ache. But it was that realization that made her so doubtful.

Did he mean the best for her after all?


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sandor will always love little birds and chickens, right? I know for sure he will keep them both safe in this chapter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my loves,
> 
> It is a lovely Sunday here with a lot of sun and I am hoping you are enjoying yourself today! I treated myself with the time to write about my guilty pleasure. I hope you will enjoy!

Sansa had no idea what time it was when she woke, but she did know Sandor was still behind her on the bed, keeping her warm. His hand had never moved from her stomach, keeping her aches at a comfortable level.

She knew she should move away, even though his warm body was feeling so nice against her own. Maybe she was giving him the wrong idea of what she wanted from him. Maybe lying here, allowing him to touch her like he did would start things she was not ready for.

He would keep her here for an entire year and if she still wanted to go by then…. He had said he would let her go. Would he really though?

But no matter how many thoughts like those drifted around in her head, she could not bring herself to move away. He was warm and safe and … he seemed asleep still. What had brought him to do this for her?

Sansa felt him stir a little behind her and then she heard him clear his throat. So, he had been asleep.

He moved a little more and Sansa felt him pull her a little more against himself, while he hoovered a bit above her.

‘You awake, little bird?’ His voice sounded so deep and rough. If Sansa had any doubt about him faking sleep, it was gone now, hearing his voice being even deeper than usual. Sansa murmured a soft yes and felt his hold on her belly get a little firmer, before he released her.

‘Are you feeling better?’ Sansa swallowed and then nodded, turning on her back, so she could see him. His eyes found hers easily. She was stunned to see there was actually a little bit of worry in his eyes, before he intensified his gaze and his eyes landed on her belly for a moment, before he looked her in the eyes again.

‘We should eat something. That will make you feel better too. Come.’

* * *

Once again Sansa sat down in the kitchen and watched while Sandor was making her food. He had boiled some eggs and was slicing some bread. She wondered how he kept all the food fresh as there was no way there was a baker or supermarket here on this small island. Did he make the food himself, from scratch?

He also boiled some water and within a few minutes he placed bread, butter, cheese, tea and the eggs on the table, handing her a plate.

When he sat down himself, he also handed her a glass of water and two little pills. Sansa felt an alarm go off in her head and stared up at him, placing the pills on the table.  
He took no offense at her look and gave her a blank face. He nodded to her stomach, which she was still clutching with one hand.

‘Harmless painkillers. Just take them.’ She stared at him suspiciously, but he paid her glares no mind. He started buttering a slice of bread, before he placed some cheese on it and took a bite.

Sansa decided to do the same and after eating a slice of bread that tasted very nice, and her egg, she took the pills and swallowed them down with the water. Sandor did not say a thing about it, but she could swear he smiled a little when the pills suddenly were gone from the table and her glass of water was empty. The silence was not that awkward for the first time, Sansa noticed. The only sounds that were made were those of a knife on a plate or the movement of a cup of tea. In a strange way it felt very homey and safe.

‘Ready to meet our chickens today?’ Sansa felt her eyes grow wide. What was he talking about? What chickens?

She saw his eyes lit up with amusement as he realised she had no clue what he was speaking of.

‘You would have seen them if you had come with me outside, little bird. We will go and meet with them later. You’ll like them. They have little birds among them too.’

Sansa decided to ignore his teasing words and eat her bread and eggs. But she did hear him chuckle.

* * *

Sansa decided she had been right about the cold wind outside. Even a warm sweater and her coat could not completely shield her away from the wind, but being outside was nice. The sun was out and made everything look that much more colourful.

Although she was imprisoned here and everything he had done was against her will, she could not deny that this island was beautiful. It was so green, and the mountains made the landscape rugged and beautiful at the same time.

The view around the house kind of took her breath away. Sandor was ahead of her, he too was wearing a thick coat over his lumberjack shirt. He led her around the house, where there was indeed a chicken coop. It was spacious enough and prettily made out of wood, and the chickens were basically scattered everywhere.

‘Aren't you afraid of them running away?’ Sansa forgot her own troubles for a moment, and she really wondered if the chickens wouldn't fall off a cliff, or be blown away by the fierce wind.

Sandor grinned and kneeled to take on of the chickens in his hands.

‘No, little bird. They know where they belong. They like it here.’

Sansa saw several chickens of all colours and sizes happily walk around them and she was delighted to see little chicks running among them as well.

She could barely contain herself. She stayed where she was, but she would rather have stroked and cuddled one of the chicks. She watched as Sandor stroked the chicken and then put it back on the grass and stood up. Sansa walked a short distance from him and knelt in the grass, close to a few chicks. They did not even take offense at her and approached her curiously.

Within seconds they were walking on her legs and she could finally stroke them. One was even so bold to climb up her pants and it let her pick him up too.

Withholding was no longer an option for Sansa. She lifted the little fluff ball to her cheek, enjoying its soft fluff and warmth. Sansa didn't even realize she had closed her eyes until she opened them again and saw Sandor looking at her from a distance, a smile around his lips.

She had expected to see him smile smugly. Enjoying the fact that he finally got his way.

But his smile had none of that. He seemed to genuinely enjoy what he saw and that made Sansa doubt. She didn't understand anything anymore.

Was this what he wanted? And what about all the times he'd touched and kissed her. Did he just let her walk around outside and cuddle with chicks now?

The little creature made a high-pitched noise and was incredibly cute. She put him back on the grass and watched him walk happily on.

It was actually very calming and pleasant to watch the chickens. They were all wonderfully quiet, wandering around and did not really look up at anyone or anything.

Sansa wished she could be that carefree too.

She swallowed hard, then got up. All this time Sander had been watching from a distance and said nothing. He hadn’t told her to hurry up or told her what to do and what not to do. He just let her be. Sansa hadn't expected that, but it did made her feel a little bit better.

She now also understood how he got all those fresh eggs.

Sander beckoned her when she stopped at a distance and walked slowly towards him. She still had a little stomach ache, but the painkillers and the rest she'd taken had done their job.

He stared into the distance for a moment, then looked back at her.

‘Can you take a short walk?’ Sansa raised her head proudly and nodded quickly.  
His chuckles were soft, but Sansa heard them.

He led her down a path and she walked among large bushes so green it almost hurt her eyes. The sun felt wonderfully warm despite the chilly wind, and for the first time in a long time, Sansa enjoyed being outside, even though it was with Sandor.

They walked for a few minutes, until Sandor suddenly stopped and Sansa, who had not been paying attention to anything other than nature around her, bumped right into him.

His movement was swift and flawless. He turned and grabbed her to keep her from falling or tripping. He didn't pull her close, he just held her.

‘Sorry,’ Sansa muttered, feeling her cheeks redden. He said nothing, but his eyes burned into hers.

'We are here. Look.’ She struggled to break their eye contact, he looked at her way too intensely. But when she did, her mouth formed a quiet o.

The view was breathtaking. More beautiful than anything she had seen in her life so far. They were on a high cliff, looking out for miles over land and sea. The sun shone in the water and the waves crashed hard on the cliffs.

So, nature could be that beautiful.

'The most beautiful place on earth. At least for me.’ Sansa couldn't tear her eyes away from everything she saw before them just yet, but quietly agreed. It was beautiful and so peaceful.

When she finally looked at him, her eyes met his.

‘It's beautiful.’ He nodded and looked curiously at her. It was almost as if he were seeing her for the first time, he absorbed her so intensely. Sansa quickly looked away when she felt the tension in the air.

‘But just as dangerous as it is beautiful. So, stay around the house, and if you want to walk further, you ask me.’

There was a dark promise in his words. The challenge he absolutely did not want her to face would not go unpunished, she felt.

She nodded, then looked straight away. She didn't feel like being alone outside in this cold wind. She was afraid of falling from cliffs and preferred his presence and a warm house rather than the beautiful but dangerous nature, while being alone.

‘Come, let us go back inside, so you can rest a bit more and I’ll start the fire. It will be a cold night, I reckon.’

* * *

Not much had been spoken that afternoon and even during dinner nothing was said. Still, the silence was not unpleasant or uncomfortable. Sansa thought back to the beautiful nature she had seen, and which had made a deep impression on her.

She now placed Sandor in a different place in her head. The fact that he enjoyed nature so much and wanted to show her that, she secretly thought was quite sweet.

She also thought back to earlier that day, when he lay in bed with her and, despite her protests, warmed her stomach with his big hand. What should she think of that?

He might have had more chances to grope or touch her here in this house than ever before on the road, but he didn't. It confused her a lot.

She wanted to say that he was a monster and that he treated her badly here. But she couldn't. He fed her, kept her warm and safe, and actually took very good care of her.

He seemed to really enjoy her pleasure, strange as she thought it.

She was now sitting comfortably in front of the fireplace, enjoying the warmth of the fire. Sandor sat in his chair and enjoyed some whiskey. He had asked her if she wanted a glass too, but she had declined. She never had enjoyed whiskey or any other strong liquid.

She yawned for a moment and closed her eyes, enjoying the fire in front of her. She knew that the longer she sat here, the more likely she was to fall asleep in front of the fireplace. The heat was just too nice.

‘How are you feeling?’ he asked her, his tone gentle, his voice so deep. She shrugged her shoulders.

‘Better.’

‘You really don't like the cold, do you,’ His deep voice came from behind her and she shivered when she heard and felt his words.

'Not really.' His chuckles were loud, but she chose to ignore them. She kept staring at the flames before her.

'Is that why you like to snuggle up to me in bed? Just because of my warmth then, little bird?’ She recognized his teasing tone, but there was also a silent question in his words that Sansa was aware of.

Her mind drifted back to last morning when she had found herself so very close to him in bed and she had no clue if he had initiated that, or her. She felt her cheeks grow red. Had she initiated it?

She swallowed painfully and suddenly was very aware of his big body behind her.

‘I don't know what you're talking about,’ she said quickly. A lie. Even she heard it. She was sure he had heard it as well.

He cleared his throat and seemed to sigh.

‘No need for lies, Sansa.’ She remained silent and moved closer to the fire. She didn't want to talk to him about her feelings. She preferred not to talk at all.

He made her insecure, scared and confused. And she hated it.

‘Maybe you would rather have given yourself to a handsome young, clumsy teenager. But he would have kept you less warm and safe. That’s for sure. He would have broken your heart, eventually.’

Sansa turned her head when he said the latter.

'You don't know that.' She was angry, but scared. He looked even bigger than he was, sitting in his chair like that while she was on the floor in front of him. What was he playing at?

'You're afraid I'll hurt you. Am I right?' Sansa turned her head as she felt her cheeks flush even more. It had to be the whiskey he was drinking, that made him talk so boldly. But then again, he never had needed whiskey to talk dirty to her or touch her. He was referring to a few nights ago when he had almost raped her. He laughed softly.

‘I didn't mean the pain of taking your virginity, little bird. You're afraid I'll leave you alone once I've had you.’ It was not even a question. He was just assuming he was right. And the worst part was, that he was right. Sansa felt her heart hurt a little.

Even now, while she had been away for some days, she knew maybe her co-workers would miss her eventually as she would not show up for work, but not even her mother really cared. The people that meant the most to her, would not even try and find her.

‘But I wouldn’t, little bird. I would cherish every touch you would allow me. I’d take good care of you. In bed and outside of it. I would never leave you alone.’ Sansa made herself small before the fireplace and wished this conversation was already over.

It took a few minutes of absolute silence before Sansa dared to speak again.

‘A year you said.’ She heard him move behind her.

‘Aye. A year.’ She just knew he was now standing behind her, his warmth on her back so very close.

‘But there’s a lot that can happen in a year, little bird. So many things I will find out about you that you cannot hide, living here with me and sharing my bed. Things you’ll learn about me too.’ She felt how he placed himself behind her, watched his long legs beside hers as he sat down, his chest against her back, engulfing her in his warmth. He used one hand to brush her hair from her shoulder and expose her shoulder underneath the loose sweater she wore.

She held her breath, unsure what he was about to do. She was afraid, but there was also something enjoyable in the tension in the air.

When she felt his lips on her shoulder, kissing her skin gently, his beard scarping over her skin, she almost sighed. She tensed up, feeling his other hand moving around her, landing on her knee, completely locking her in his hold.

‘Tell me you don’t want this, and I’ll stop.’ He kissed her shoulder again, moving closer and closer towards the front of her neck. Sansa swallowed and for a moment was lost in the feelings he was creating inside of her. It felt… nice.

‘I-‘ Sansa was not sure what she was going to say as he kissed her clavicle and made her gasp.

‘It would be even better than this, Sansa.’ She felt his muscular thighs around her and knew she was now entering dangerous territory.

This man was dangerous and knew what he was doing to her. He had explored her body before, and she wondered if he could stop if she asked him. He scared her and made her curious at the same time.

‘It can't be done now,’ she muttered. She heard Sandor laugh softly before he ran his fingers over her collarbone. She shivered.

‘And why not, little bird?’ Sansa closed her eyes when she felt his lips kiss the skin just below her ear. She bit the inside of her lip.

‘I have my period. And you're way too big.' She hadn't planned to say the latter, but that was what went on in her head when she felt him behind her. He was huge and rock hard. She feared the pain he would cause her.

This time there was no laughter or chuckling. He put his hand under her chin and held her neck very lightly but made sure to encircle it completely.

‘Blood doesn't scare me, Sansa. But I will wait for you. Wait until your fear of me is less and you are no longer bleeding. And then, when you finally allow me to have you, it will be anything but painful. I can promise you that.'

Sansa swallowed hard, and despite the warmth in front and behind her, she trembled. Sandor let go of her neck and stroked his fingers just above the edge of her shirt.

A promise. One he wanted to live up to. One she feared. But her fear was different now. It felt very different. Slowly she felt him let go of her.

‘I'm going to put you to bed, little bird. You are tired, blushing and not ready for the next step tonight. But we are in no rush. No one will disturb us here. A year is a long time to get used to each other. Come now.’

He stood and then kneeled down to gather her in her arms. Before she could protest, he stood straight with her in her arms. She instinctively wrapped her arms around her neck and looked up to meet his eyes.

‘I would never drop you, Sansa.’ She bit her lip at hearing him say those words, but remained silent, his eyes seemed more grey than ever before and so very intense.

‘Let’s get you warm and comfortable,’ he mumbled after a few seconds, walking up the stairs and every once in a while, locking eyes with her, until he gently placed her on the bed. She quickly moved to her side of the bed and watched as he started to undress himself, ridding himself of all his clothes, except for his black boxers. She swallowed when she saw the apparent bulge in his underwear and turned herself.

He was hard and huge, and he was going to lie in bed with her. She was making herself more nervous than she wanted, but he did scare her still. Would he keep to his promise? She gathered the blouse she had been sleeping in and turned to the corner of the room to undress herself, her back to him.

Behind her she heard him step into bed, a deep sigh coming from his lips when he slit himself beneath the covers.

She made sure to fold her clothes neatly and place them on the chair, before she turned and saw him lying in bed, his eyes almost closed.

‘Come little bird.’ He held the cover up for her to slide under. She slowly did, completely aware of his naked chest, arms and legs. And if all that nakedness wasn’t enough, there was his smell. So earthly and manly. No matter how hard she tried to hate it, she just couldn’t.

He let the cover down and shielded her from the cold air in the room. He then gathered her in his arms again, his warm skin instantly warming hers. No matter how much she wanted to tell him to release her. She was cold and he was so very warm… How could she not enjoy that?

And even though his enormous body scared her and made her aware of all the things he could do to her, his touches were innocent enough. He rested a warm hand on her belly and brough the other under her head to rest on.

Why was he trying so very hard to make her comfortable?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah Sandor…. Why are you being so nice to the girl????


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miscommunication... It happens a lot, right? But... Maybe there is something to learn for Sansa.... and especially Sandor....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for keeping me so motivated to write on!  
> It helps me to stay sane, LOL! I hope you enjoy!
> 
> And off to bed I go! Sweet dreams to you!

The next morning came rather early for Sansa. She only understood why when she found herself alone in bed. The warmth Sandor usually provided against her body, warming the entire bed, gone. She shivered a bit and then saw it was only a little light outside yet. It really had to be quite early. Why was Sandor already up and about?

Sansa stood from the bed and dressed herself, then wandering over towards the bathroom to freshen up. She was glad she was now equipped with everything she needed this time of the month. Her pains were gone for the biggest part, just a slight sting feelable every now and then. She returned to the bedroom to make the bed and then she made her way downstairs, curious to see what Sandor was doing.

She couldn't find him in the living room and was just wondering why he would be outside so early in the day until she saw him. He walked with a goat on a rope and released the animal in a meadow close to the house. Afterwards he walked around with a large bucket and started feeding the chickens.

He was wearing dark trousers, sturdy boots, and a flannel shirt. It didn't seem like the cold was bothering him much. The sun was just rising, and it seemed wonderfully warm in the first rays of the morning, but Sansa knew better.

Early in the morning and in those boots, he looked even bigger and stockier than he already was. There was mist damping just above the green grass, making the entire scenery kind of mysterious. His shoulders were incredibly broad, and his beard gave him a stern and mysterious look. He could look so dark, but he could also be so tender.

Sansa felt her cheeks turn red as she remembered last night. How he got behind her on the floor in front of the fireplace and held her, touched her. She even remembered how his voice had sounded and how he had smelled, so spicy and earthy, and although she wouldn't admit it, she had been thrilled and a little bit aroused. Sansa shook her head quickly, why was she thinking about these things?

Sansa smiled a little when she saw the chickens running around as fast as they could. They all tried to get to the food first. The little chicks occasionally fell over, but quickly scrambled up again. It was a funny sight.

It wasn't until Sandor looked up and his eyes looked straight into hers, that her smile froze. It felt like she had done something sneaky, something that was forbidden. His eyes were a stormy grey that took her breath away every time he locked eyes with her.

Everything he had done to her had been so wrong… But why had his touches felt right last night?

He cocked his head to the side when she did not respond or greet him. He grinned and then winked at her, before turning around and going back to feeding the chickens. Sansa felt herself unfreeze slightly as he had released her from his intense gaze.

Maybe it was because she had so little experience with men. Or because her mother's new boyfriend had been so pawing.

Memories of him gave her the shivers. She had always preferred taking care of herself and stayed away from men. The young boys who worked in her store were nice, but she had kept them at a safe distance, too, just in case.

Work and education were all that mattered. She couldn't use distraction or danger.

Men hurt you or used you. And she wanted to prevent that. She never wanted to be in a room again with a man who was after her and who she was afraid of. And here she was, at the mercy of a giant of a man. In the middle of nowhere. Stolen. A man that was so much different from the rest of the world.

One who had said more than once that he loved and wanted her. And one that was so unbelievably strong that it just took her breath away.

When she closed her eyes, she remembered that night in the cottage when he had undressed her as punishment and let his fingers slide into her. She had never been more afraid of pain and shame. It was the first time anyone had ever touched her there. She had never felt so at the mercy of anyone. So helpless.

She shivered involuntarily.

And then there was yesterday evening. He had clearly reached out and shown his affections for her, but he seemed to want to keep his promise to not force her into anything she was not willing to. He wouldn't touch her in that intimate way again. Not until she gave him permission.

Could a man really stick to that? What if she waited for this year he promised her, to be over, and he never got the chance again? Would he really let her go then?

She also remembered the night he had almost raped her. He had brought his manhood against her feminine lips and tried to slip inside.

She had been so tight it wasn't easy. She still didn't know why he didn't push through at the time. Something had stopped him. Not her pleas, he'd ignored them from the start, but it seemed he didn't want to hurt her then.

She felt cold thinking about what he had done to her that night, as well as what he could have done. Why hadn't he raped her? What had stopped him?

Sansa was still completely lost in thought when the door opened. She looked up in alarm and saw the astonished face of Sandor.

‘Are you okay, little bird?’ Sansa nodded quickly. Sandor didn't seem convinced. She looked like she had seen a ghost. But he decided to ignore that for now.

‘You- you were up early.’ A grin broke through on his face.

'Did you miss me in bed, maybe? Or just my warm body, hmm? ' His teasing tone frightened Sansa. The thoughts of previous intimate situations between them, which had just been going through her mind, made her weak. She really needed to break out of it.

He brushed off his clothes and then continued to the kitchen.

'Are you hungry, little bird? Time for breakfast.’

Sansa followed him into the kitchen and watched as he laid eggs on the counter and then went to turn the kettle on.

‘Where does the bread come from?’ The question slipped her mind as he removed a cloth from a basket and revealed a brown bread. It looked fresh enough.

He turned to her and seemed amazed by her interest and question.

‘This is still from the stock I brought. After this we will have to bake bread again. We have enough food for some time to come. Canned cereals, vegetables and fruit. And I grow some fruit and vegetables outside. The animals take care of the rest.’

Sansa stared at him. So, he really knew what he was doing in the middle of nowhere.

‘Are there more animals than the chickens and the goat?’ she asked him? He smiled. He seemed to really appreciate her interest.

‘Three cows. There are also some horses on the island, but they are not mine. And I can fish and hunt. So, plenty of meat. We have a small generator. Enough power for the freezer and refrigerator.’ Sansa was dumbfounded. He was well prepared. Really well prepared.

While he went to work, making a plate for both of them with a slice of bread, cheese, and fried eggs, Sansa poured the tea and bombarded him with questions now that he seemed so willing to answer them.

‘Have you lived here long? I thought you lived in England, close to my job?’ He cleared his throat and handed her a full plate.

‘I've lived here for years. And that is what I intend to do in the coming years. I have had a temporary home in England. I still had a few things to do there. And I needed to restock. But when I saw you- Let's just say I wanted to go back.’

What things did you have to do in England? Sansa didn't realize she'd crossed a line with her question until he looked up and his eyes were darker than ever before.

‘Family affairs.’

She quickly looked away and ate from her plate. There was no talk after this. Sansa was startled by his look and seemed lost in thought as he continued to eat.

* * *

The afternoon passed slowly.

Sandor had asked her if she wanted to go outside, but she refused. She watched him disappear around the house, then looked for something legible in the small bookcase.

She always loved reading, but she had no idea if she could do it here. She wanted nothing more than to let her mind wander into a fictional world.

As she looked at the books, she remembered the dark look in his eyes during breakfast.

Why had he gotten so angry at her question? She had never seen his gaze so sharply before.

Family matters ... What did he mean by that? And how did he actually get those scars on his face?

She knew now she wasn't going to ask him that question for a while, maybe never.

She had become a little less afraid of him after yesterday. He had been so nice when she had pain in her stomach. But this morning ... This morning she had seen the shadows that lurked inside of him, and they scared her quite a bit.

She tried hard to keep her mind away from her fears, but being here, in this home that so clearly belonged to him, it was a hard task. She could not find a book she liked well enough, and she decided to see if the chickens could cheer her up. She took her coat and wrapped herself in it, making her way outside. She did not see Sandor anywhere and decided she could walk over towards the chickens. He had said she could be outside if she sticked close to the house.

The chicks caught her attention and she loved to cuddle them. They squeaked and ran back and forth quickly, but they seemed to especially enjoy pecking her hair and walking on her legs.

She giggled as a few of them stormed her, so she had to get up. She took a few steps to the side, then saw the enormous shadow looming next to her.

‘Oh,’ was all she could say. Sandor looked down at her. For a moment she was afraid of his dark look, but he looked at her with a cheerful glance in his eyes.

‘Were you hugging and tickling them again, little bird?’ Sansa swallowed, then nodded. He grinned.

‘Lucky chickens. Do you want to see the vegetable garden?’ Sansa followed him and saw that he had been busy.

‘It has been a bit neglected here for a while, but it will be something again. Have you ever eaten something from your own garden?’ He leaned on a shovel but kept looking straight at her.

Sansa shook her head quickly. He nodded.

‘Then you will experience something. It's a lot of work, but wonderful. Maybe we can go for a walk again tomorrow. Then I'll show you where I usually fish and where wild animals roam.’ Sansa's eyes must have betrayed her fear a little, because he noticed the change in her right away.

‘Don't be afraid, little bird. I'll keep you safe. Even against wild boars.'

* * *

That night Sandor was still busy outside after dinner, so Sansa curled herself up in the chair and enjoyed the warmth of the fire.

She had already washed herself and was now in a long blouse, her hair drying up in sweatpants. She was already feeling drowsy and was startled when the door opened.

‘Little bird?’ His deep voice echoed through the house.

'I'm here.' She heard his footsteps. He looked at her endearingly and gave her a brief nod at the fire.

‘Warm enough for you?’ Sansa nodded. He laughed and mumbled something about washing himself before disappearing to the bathroom.

Sansa stared into the flames and wondered if this was her life now. Would she spend every night with him in front of the fire? Have pleasant conversations at times and sometimes be terrified of his temper and strength?

When she heard him enter the room again, Sansa quickly rose from the chair to make room for him.

She sat down on the floor wondering if she might go to bed soon, she was tired enough. Her long red hair was almost dry. Then she wouldn't have any trouble falling asleep, even if she was alone in the cold bed.

She saw out of the corner of her eye that he was sitting down in the chair.

‘Fled from me, little bird?’ She swallowed and bit her cheek. Was he referring to the fact that she made way for him on the chair?

'You must be tired after all that working outside. I'm going to bed soon. I just want to dry my hair in front of the fire.'

She heard him sigh, but she could handle that. What she couldn't handle as well was that he bent down to take her in his arms. Then he sat back in the chair with her in his arms. He put her on his lap sideway and brushed her half-wet hair over her shoulders. His grey eyes seemed much more intense and alarming from this close.

‘Isn't this more comfortable, hmm?’ Sansa swallowed and looked away from his sharp eyes. He had to grip her chin to look into her eyes again. She was shocked at first, but his grip was so soft and gentle that she didn't panic.

‘You're afraid of me,’ he noted. Sansa was afraid to respond, afraid of his dark look from that morning. He sighed deeply. She felt how he let her lean against his chest.

He had put an arm around her to keep her from falling, and he let go of her chin.

‘You don't have to say anything, I can feel you tremble.’ She put her head against his chest and felt him take a deep breath before he ran one hand through her hair. Her long locks were almost dry now, she realized. It felt good. He had huge hands, but never hurt her. He kept caressing her hair and they sat there in silence. The only sound that could be heard was the crackling of the fire.

‘What's the worst I could do to you, Sansa?’ Sansa had absolutely not foreseen that question. The tension she suddenly felt around her made her want to get away from his lap. He was too close. She didn't want to answer that question.

He felt her tighten and before she could slip off his lap, he grabbed both of her thighs, she was trapped.

‘You're not running away now, little bird. Just tell me.’ She looked up and met his eyes much sooner than she would have liked. She saw that he had asked the question out of genuine interest. Could it be that he didn't know how to get closer to her?

He didn't let go of her thighs, but now stroked them absently. He didn't break eye contact.

‘Sansa?’ Came his gruff voice when she remained silent. She sighed softly and then looked away.

‘I don’t know.’ A lie. Both of them knew that instantly.

‘Don’t lie to me. I can always tell when you are lying, Sansa.’ Sansa tried to keep her eyes adverted, but something in his voice made her look up and meet them.  
‘Tell me.’ She took another deep breath.

‘I am not sure… A lot of what I feared-‘ She then fell silent, but he understood.

‘I made your fears come true already, didn’t I? Taking you, touching you… making you feel pleasure.’ Sansa’s eyes grew big as he spoke.

‘What?’ she gasped. He went on.

‘Kidnapping you was wrong. Touching you was…. Not right either. But the pleasure was nothing that harmed you, right? It was simply new for you.’ She was not sure what he was trying to say, but the thoughts about the times he had forced himself on her suddenly came back full force and it scared her a lot. Why was he talking about this with her now?

‘I am not someone that likes to be touched. Not by anyone. I never sought that kind of connection with others.’ She tried to make him see. To let him believe her words were true. They were, in a way. She had always tried to keep herself safe. And now that he had taken her, she couldn’t.

He huffed.

‘There is so much wrong in that, that I do not even know where to begin and correct it, little bird.’ She looked away, but he took her chin in his fingers again, forcing her to meet his eyes.

‘You were trying to keep yourself sheltered from the world. But even then, you can be harmed little bird. Here, with me, at least you are safe. No one will hurt you here, or I will deal with them.’ Sansa felt tears gather in her eyes at hearing his firm words and seeing his intense eyes. What was he trying to say?

‘You have hurt me.’ He bit his lip after hearing her words.

‘Only a little. There’s more pleasure to be had than pain. I’d make sure of that. I would help you enjoy your body, teach you about it. If you’d let me.’ She tried to pull her chin from his fingers, but he was not yet finished.

‘You could be happier here, living with me, than working your ass off in a store, only making ends meet Sansa. Think on it, you can spend every day like you wish, no one will bother you here. You would be free, little bird.’ Sansa felt a tear escape her eye. Sandor seemed to notice it too, wiping it away, before releasing his grip on her chin.

‘Time for bed, I reckon. Come little bird. I will keep you safe tonight.’


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is some more darkness to face as we go deeper into this story. Yes... there will be more angst and no it will not go super smoothly between these two from here on out. 
> 
> Sandor is Sandor... grumpy, dark humor, big, sexy, strong and he takes what he wants. But maybe he now has found she holds a place in his heart, more than he thought so before.
> 
> And our little bird has to learn to live. To dare to breathe and just do things.... Can he help her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for sticking with me and this story! 
> 
> This one is for everyone who keeps reading and enjoying Sandor and Sansa’s journey in Scotland! 
> 
> Not sure about how every chapter will be... but I do know there will be some bumps in the road, because I love to create them! LOL.
> 
> Enjoy!

Sleep did not come easily for Sansa that night. She heard Sandor’s breathing becoming more even as he drifted off into sleep easily, but her mind was filled with everything he had told her just before they had gone to bed. And that troubled her.

She was completely confused about everything, but mostly his motives. Did he really think she could be happier here than back in her own little world? That she would find happiness here, being stolen from her own life? That he could just take her and plant her here and tell her to adjust and learn to love him? That she would ever want to be here out of her own free will?

Sansa bit her lip as his hand moved around her waist in his sleep and pulled her a little closer. She had almost grown used to his touches at night. They were innocent enough, but even in his sleep he sought her body. He wanted her close even while dreaming. Sansa didn’t understand. He rested that big warm hand on her waist and she instantly felt warmer for it. But more confused than ever before.

Touches. What exactly had he told her when she said she didn’t really like being touched? Her mind felt so blurry.

_‘There is so much wrong in that, that I do not even know where to begin and correct it, little bird.'_

What did he mean by that? Correct what?

He said he’d keep her safe… From whom or what? There was nothing here on this island. Only himself.

Sansa couldn't fall asleep. She slipped away from time to time, then woke up with a start. And during all this Sandor was just sleeping peacefully. He had turned and was now facing her, his arm loosely over her hip.

It was hours before Sansa finally fell into a restless sleep.

* * *

‘Little bird.’ The nudging was annoying, but Sansa could not yet completely place the feeling on her arm. But when the touches grew more firm, she gasped and opened her eyes.

Cold sweat was on her back and she felt hot, too hot. She had the feeling she had run a mile, only to escape a demon in her dreams, to wake up to another dangerous man in the same bed, gently nudging her awake.

‘Little bird, are you alright? You were having a nightmare, you are safe.’ Sansa felt Sandor lift her up in bed and hold her against him. She could only nod, when all of a sudden, she got very cold.

It had been a long time since she had woken up from a nightmare. It had seemed so real. So ... terrifyingly real.

‘Who is Petyr, Sansa?’ Sansa wasn't quite clear yet, but she did hear the warning in Sandor's voice. She felt herself freezing. Had she called his name in her sleep? Oh no.

'What?' she asked him. She swallowed hard, leaning unconsciously against his warm, sturdy body.

‘You called his name. You… screamed.’ Sansa swallowed again, then turned away from him. But Sandor did not let her escape so easily. He grabbed her arms and pulled her back into bed next to him and held her there.

‘A love from the past?’ Sansa looked offended and saw that Sandor was deadly serious. Still, his gaze thawed when he saw her look.

'A love?' she asked incredulously. Sandor said nothing and didn’t move, but his eyes kept drilling into hers, almost forcing her to answer him.

'You're still a virgin, so it couldn't have been such a great love. But I still want to know.' Sansa angrily tried to free himself from his hands, but he didn't budge.

'Say it.' Sansa looked at him with angry eyes.

'Petyr was my mom's new boyfriend. One who couldn't keep his hands away when she wasn't around. Okay?' It was almost scary how the look in Sandor's eyes changed. From accusatory and threatening to absolutely murderous.

‘What did he do to you?’ Sansa looked away at hearing his tone turn dark. His usually gruff voice went even lower. It was the most dangerous she had ever heard him speak.

'I do not want to talk about it. I haven't had nightmares about it for so long. I just want to forget.’

* * *

Sansa had not spoken much that day and Sandor had not forced her to. He had left her inside where she told him she wanted to be and went outside himself. He tended to the garden and the animals, before he went back to his woodchopping.

Sansa stared outside and was lost in her memories and the nightmare she had.

Why had she dreamed about that just now? Why if it had been so long ago and there were so many miles between her and her old life? There was no one here, no one but her, Sandor and the animals.

She was safe from him. At least as long as she was here with Sandor.

That was the only man in her life who kept her sharp now. The one who wanted to touch, satisfy, and love her in his, perhaps uncommon, but sincere way. Sansa sighed as her head dizzy with all the worry she felt.

Sandor didn't come in all day, it wasn't until dinner time, when Sansa was already checking the cupboards to see what she might prepare, that he took over from her. There were not many words spoken, but their silence was no longer painful, just a little awkward at times. But if Sandor thought anything about her and her nightmares now, he was not saying anything about it to her. Or not yet anyway.

In silence they ate the meat Sandor cooked. His eyes every now and then on her, but Sansa choose to ignore it for now.

* * *

‘You screamed. A few times actually.’ Sansa heard him say the words and just knew he tried to make her spill the entire story, but she just could not do it. She did not want him to know. She herself wished she didn’t remember it herself anymore. No such luck…

‘We should talk about it.’ Sansa then looked up. He sat in his chair, one arm resting on his leg, the other under his chin. He was staring down on her. She felt like some kind of prey. But the man behind her no longer seemed to want to eat her, at least not all the time. But he seemed desperate for her story. Even this nasty, ugly story. She had never told anyone. Not even her mother knew anything about why she had left so suddenly. Not that her mother had ever bothered to ask her about it. Maybe she had been aware of her boyfriend’s feelings for her daughter. Sansa did not know, but she had never been more relieved than when she had left. Even having little money was better than living in constant fear.

She then turned her head away and stared into the flames before her. His heavy sigh told her he wished she would just tell him everything. But she was not going to.

She was startled when he sat down beside her on the floor, his eyes not on her but the flames before them.

‘I know some stories are not that great to share. But… with the right person, it can set you free.’ Sansa huffed softly. Her story was not one that needed to be shared. Not with him or anyone else. She just wanted to forget.

He leaned back on his arms and kept watching the fire before them, not once looking at her as he spoke.

‘I was not born with these ugly burns on my face. Someone did that to me. Branded me. Ruined me for life. I was only seven at the time.’ That did catch Sansa’s attention, but Sandor did not look at her, he just went on. Like it pained him to tell her this, and he could only do it like this. In one, single go.

‘It was my brother. I had been playing with one of his toys one evening, one he had never found interesting at all. He had never played with the damn thing. Not once. But he found out. Saw me with the action figure. We had a fireplace in our home. One bigger than this one. He grabbed my collar and just pushed my face in the flames. Just like that. My mother came in to see what all the screaming was all about, but by then I was already marked for life.’

When he stopped there and Sansa could feel the pain in his words, she suddenly felt something she had never done before for him. She felt sorry. Sorry that something that horrible had happened to him. And he had spent the rest of his life thinking he was ugly and a monster. Like it was all others could see from that point. Had no one ever taken his side and told him he was handsome, even with the scars? There were little people with such strong bodies and muscles, people that respected nature so much and choose to live in peace.

Before Sansa could ask him anything, he went on.

‘My mother pushed my brother aside and pulled me from the fire, she was the one that took me to the hospital and held my hand the entire time. She was furious with my brother and later with my old man as he forbade her to tell anyone what had happened. My father chose to protect his older son, the one who burnt his other sons face off, instead of his youngest, now scarred son. I never forget the look on my mother’s face when she first saw me, or the pity in her eyes. She was afraid of my father, but from that day on she was also afraid of what her oldest son was capable off.’

Sansa had never heard Sandor speak for so long at a time. She could tell he had given this story a place in his mind, but it still hurt him.

‘Your own brother?’ Sansa realised her voice sounded very soft and so small. But Sandor looked at her for the first time now and only nodded. There was pain behind his eyes, accompanied with a determination she had not seen before.

‘Aye little bird. My own brother. Go figure.’ Sansa licked her suddenly dry lips. She wanted to tell him she was sorry for everything he had to go through, but she was afraid to do so. Everything about him told her he was not one who wanted to be pitied, not by anyone.

‘I left home after my mother died, I was young. Very young. But I came here. Found my peace. Made a life for myself. One without demons from my past. It took a lot of surgeries to fix what was left of my face when I was young. But my mother had been there the entire time, for every surgery. Like she could fix what her other son had done. She was strong, and brave, but not brave enough to leave her husband that treated her, her youngest son and daughter like they were nothing more than dirt on his shoes.’

Sansa watched him stare into the fire and wondered what it felt like for him to be so close to fire while he had been burnt so badly by the flames. It could not be that easy. How long had it taken him to face his fears?

‘That’s awful.’ He only nodded. Sansa saw the big man beside her a little different now. Maybe his past made him act the way he did. That he had kidnapped her. That did not make it better or right. But maybe he didn't know any better.

‘Have you ever seen them again?’ Sansa dared to ask. Sandor shook his head, a dark frown appeared on his face.

‘My mother and sister are gone. Dead. My father has passed away too.’ Sansa felt pain in her chest thinking about everything he had been going through. So much pain. So much misery. No one deserved that.

‘And your- your brother?’ Sansa felt her heart beat a little fast when he turned his dark frown on her, but he remained silent about what had become of his brother. He let his hand moved over his beard and then stared at the fire once more, letting silence fill the room.

‘So little bird, I do know a bit about nightmares and sharing painful stories.’ He glanced at her and now it was Sansa that looked away. She was genuinely grateful that he had shared his story with her. It helped her understand him better. But it didn't make it any easier to talk about herself or her demons.

‘Walls keep everybody out, Sansa. Boundaries teach people where the door is.’ Sansa was surprised by those words. He himself was someone with a dark story that he didn't tell anyone. Or at least he gave her that impression. He was so private as a person, but now he had suddenly opened up like this.

‘I- I can’t. Not yet anyway.’ They both remained silent after that. Still, the silence felt different now. Friendlier. Sansa dared to look up at him now and was amazed that such a tall, rugged man had been hurt so much. Maybe that's why he had grown so big and so strong. To make sure that no one could hurt him anymore. Never again.

‘When you are ready, I’ll be here, little bird.’


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love and hate walk a thin line.... Sansa has to face the music eventually. And what does her heart have to say about that gruff, big man?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I think you are going to love and hate me for this chapter. Probably first the hate then the love part, LOL…. Slight smut ahead, I hope you like it!
> 
> Once again thank you for sharing your thoughts on this story with me, it makes me feel amazing to know you guys are enjoying this!
> 
> Here we go!

Sansa wondered why she always worried the most when she was lying in bed. Sandor was breathing softly beside her, he had been asleep for most of the night. She had drifted off at first, but was wide awake once again.

Him sharing his story with her had been so confronting and yet so clarifying. But she had just not been able to voice her story. She had not told him she felt sorry for everything he had gone through when he had been so very young, but she was. And she was afraid he would see her different, if he knew her demons. They were horrible and scary. But they were her demons. It was her past. Her fears.

She looked beside her and saw Sandor fast asleep. He was lying on bis back, his chest not even covered by the blankets. His muscular chest with dark hairs on it made her bite her lip. For someone that thought himself so ugly, she actually found him quite the opposite. Maybe his face wasn’t perfect, but he was still a man most woman would want, seeing his strength and body, and the strong features on his face. And his skills to make a living on his own. Not depending on anyone or needing anyone. And then he could be so very caring when he wanted to. He could be kind. Like he was with the animals. Pretty amazing actually.

And he could be gentle, especially for someone so big and gruffy. His voice was deep and yes, he sometimes scared her with that dark look into his eyes. But he had not broken his promise about not forcing her. He had not initiated kisses or touches. Not once. And she was a little surprised by it.

Petyr had been so very nice and kind in the beginning. When her father had died her mother had been lost. So completely lost. And then she had met Petyr. An old friend. She fell in love completely. Her mother had not been able to see any fault in Petyr. She had forgotten about her daughters and sons. About their pain and grief. The oldest boys, John and Robb, had been back for the funeral, but left shortly after, back to their own lives with their wifes. Brann and Rickon choose to stay on campus permanently after father died and Arya was on the run from her feelings. Her pain. Sansa had not seen anyone of them in the past year.

They would not even notice she was gone, because of the lack of contact. How horrible that may sound, it also made it less likely Sansa would ever have to face Petyr again. And that was what she wanted, to never, ever see him again.

Thinking about his touches and words made her feel so very small. He had been hunting her like prey. Every time her mother had been gone, he’d strike. He’d made Sansa’s life a pure hell and she still felt her heart clench thinking about it. Sansa felt tears slowly fall from her eyes, but it didn’t matter, no one would see. Softly she cried. About herself, her lost life and the pain in her past, but she also cried for the child Sandor had been. The pain he must have felt and how alone he must have been.

After crying out most of her pain, Sansa grew cold and turned her back towards Sandor, but moved herself closer to him. He was so very warm. He always slept in only a boxer short, but still providing so much heat the entire bed felt nice and warm. When her back touched his arm, she stilled. Close enough. Warm enough.  
She felt him stir a bit before he moved too and wrapped an arm around her, moving on his side, pulling her close. Sansa sighed. He was a nice substitute for the fireplace, his warmth almost overwhelming, but very nice and welcome.

‘Sleep little bird.’ His voice was deep from sleep, sounding rough and hoarse. Sansa felt a chill run down her spine. She closed her eyes and really tried to sleep. But it was hard. She swallowed and felt the hand around her waist rest just under her breast now, warming her even there. She placed her own hand over his, not sure why, but it calmed her to feel his big, strong fingers. She tried to think about nothing, absolutely nothing at all and then, when she thought she would never ever fall asleep again, she drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

At breakfast, Sansa was quiet, perhaps more to than other times. If Sandor noticed it, he did not call her out on it, but his eyes watched her with a little concern in them. Like he was aware there was something bothering her. Sansa noticed he gave her a plate with a slice more bread on it than the other days, maybe he thought she needed it.

‘Everything alright with you, little bird?’ Sansa stared at him, before she nodded once and looked away.

‘Do I remember you of Petyr?’ His voice sounded rough, raspy. But Sansa heard the uncertainty in his words. Why did he ask her that?

She looked up alarmed.

‘What?’ her voice sounded louder than normal, because he was forcing her in a direction she hated, one she dreaded. She did not want to talk about Petyr or him touching her. She had only succeeded in keeping those nightmares away when she was not speaking or thinking about it.

‘He touched you… didn’t he. Like I did?’ She saw Sandor swallow uncomfortably. Like this was weighing on him. Hurting him too. That could not be, could it? Sansa choose to look away.

‘I just want to forget everything. Please.’ He cleared his throat.

‘I cannot undo what I did to you Sansa. The- forcing you part. I regret that. More now I sense what you have been going through. I never wanted to hurt you. Harm you… I should have never did that.’ He fell silent as she still refused to look at him. But his words did surprise her. Was he apologizing to her?

‘But I do not regret taking you with me. I believe you belong with me. Here.’ She then did look up, meeting his eyes.

What she saw in his eyes astonished her. It was guilt and pain, insecurity. Did he really feel that way? She could hardly imagine that this was the same man who had stripped her from her clothes and forced his fingers inside of her.

Where had his ominous tone gone? His words to keep her in line. To make her obey. Had he changed or was he just adapting his tactics to get what he wanted?

He couldn't really care about and love her as he claimed. Or could he?

There was a long pause between them, and Sansa could only look away from all the emotion in his eyes. They both remained silent for a long time, until Sandor cleared his throat to get her attention.

‘Let’s go on that walk, shall we.’

* * *

The view was amazing. Sandor had led her down a small trail that went down to a little river. All she could see were flowers, bushes, birds and bees. Sansa soaked everything in, letting it wash away her pain and demons. She felt a little lighter walking here, even if Sandor cast her worried glances every now and then.

She knew he wanted for her to open up, but she just was not ready for him to find out about her past. Not yet. Maybe never.

‘A river that holds a lot of fish, and helps to cool down in summer too,’ Sandor told her, leaning against and old fence, watching her. Sansa could not help but smile, walking around here and feeling the slight breeze and sun on her face.

‘It beautiful,’ she told him, closing her eyes to feel the sun even better.

‘Aye, as are you,’ he answered her. Sansa quickly opened her eyes and watched him. He stood tall, out in the open, he wore a brown jacket and dark jeans with black boots. He seemed intimidating enough, his height only adding to it.

He stared at her with a mischievous look in his eyes. Sansa felt a little confused about it. What was he thinking about?

He grinned at her, then pushed off the fence to walk slowly towards her and the river. The way he walked reminded her of a predator waiting to strike.

He walked on until he stood next to her and looked at her calmly. Sansa forced herself to stop moving. She wouldn't keep running. Not even if he frightened her with his close proximity.

With his grey eyes and that mischievous look, he kept looking at her. He challenged her. But for what?

‘Are you still afraid of me?’ The question came so unexpected that Sansa felt her jaw drop. She quickly looked away and realized he had won the challenge.

'Sometimes.' He grunted approvingly, as if he knew she was, but only wanted to hear her tell the truth.

'And you don't feel anything else. Nothing but fear of me, little bird? ' Sansa swallowed hard, struggling not to walk away.

He reached for a lock of her fiery red hair and let it run through his fingers.

‘You are wonderfully cuddly at night, though.’ Sansa froze for a moment and felt caught. She was aware that she would snuggle up to him more at night than him forcing her. But until now he hadn't said anything about it.

‘There's nothing to be ashamed of, Sansa. I enjoy it when you snuggle up to me. It also makes me wonder about what else you think of me. Whether you feel anything for this ugly old dog at all.’ Sansa cringed a bit at the words he used on himself.

‘Don’t say that about yourself.’ Sandor seemed surprised as she spoke, and a little amused. What was he up to?

‘So, you are not completely unmoved by me then, are you little bird? You are just afraid that if you make any move at all it will force you down the road to me fucking you. Right? And that still scares you.’ Sansa felt herself become quite red at his bold words.

She turned around and heard his chuckle. But she also felt his hand on her shoulder, gripping her gently as he stepped behind her to shield her from the slight breeze.

‘I would stop at any given time, Sansa. Just say the words and I’d stop.’ She did not dare to look up and instead looked before her. The river seemed unmoved by everything that happened on its riverbeds. But she was not. She felt warm and uncomfortable.

‘Turn around little bird.’ Sansa took a minute, but then she did, tension in her body about what he was planning on doing, but there was also curiosity inside of her. Realizing that made her feel scared and thrilled at the same time.

He rested both his hands on her waist, keeping her close, but loosely. She could break away if she wanted too. It was as if he was putting much effort in making her realise just that.

He eyed her lips hungrily, but he did not act on it. Not yet. Sansa could not help but stare at him too. He did so many things to her by just looking at her like he just won the lottery or something. Why did he do that?

He brought one hand to her face and let his fingers stroke her cheek, before he placed a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

‘Let me kiss you, Sansa.’ His eyes found hers again. She didn’t answer immediately, but she also didn’t say no. She thought on it and that alone scared her. She was picturing his lips on hers and how that had felt. She bit her lip, seeing his eyes grow wider at that.

She then gave him the slightest nod, wanting to see if he would only kiss her, and not force her into more. She saw the surprised look in his eyes, but also the lust. He put a hand to her neck and buried it in her hair. His other hand slipped around her jaw and held her as if she were the most vulnerable possession he had. The most precious thing he had ever seen.

The most beautiful thing he had ever held in his hands. He brought his face closer to hers and gave her a very light, soft kiss on her lips. He then put his head back slightly and looked at her. Sansa also opened her eyes and waited to see what he was going to do.

She was afraid to move, but she wanted more. She needed to see what he would do next. If he would keep his word, no matter how he felt.

He brought his lips back to hers and kissed her again. This time with more passion and more power. She felt his tongue slide against her lips as if he were asking to be let in. And when he moved the hand in her hair and kneaded her scalp, she sighed into the kiss and gave him the access he wanted.

He kissed her as if it were their last day on Earth and stroked her jaw with his thumb. The sensations he produced filled Sansa's mind so that she could think of nothing but this moment. And although she didn't want to admit it, she enjoyed it. She enjoyed it a lot.

He kissed her until they were both breathless. He rested his forehead against hers, his warm eyes gazing up into her blue ones.

‘Not unmoved then. Just uncertain and curious, aye?’ He spoke the words softly, his eyes never leaving hers to see what she was thinking. Waiting for her to pull back.  
Sansa licked her lips and then rested her hands against his chest. Not pushing him away, just feeling him.

What did she think? She felt her heart beat fast, but she was a loss for words as she felt his heart beat under her hands and then his lips against her forehead as he kissed her there softly. 

'Let's go back, hmm? before it grows dark. Come little bird.' 


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Opening up will set you free, it’s what Sansa will learn in this chapter! And after the breaking comes the building… and maybe some love…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, let me start by saying how much your reviews made my day! I just couldn’t stop writing! I hope you like this chapter! It will end on a really sweet note, promise! I cannot wait to write more after this chapter… 
> 
> I still plan for this to be a slow burn and longer story, so no worries!
> 
> Enjoy!

Sansa had gone to bed a little early, uncertain what exactly had happened between the two of them and what she wanted right now. Sandor had seemed in a pretty good mood after their walk. He had made a stew with beef and vegetables, serving it with bread. Sansa’s stomach was full after, the problem now was her heart and her head, both not sure how to feel right now.

The kiss had not been the problem either. It had been nice. It was the first time he had kissed her she could say that. It had been good. Warm, soft and nice. All things she never had thought thinking about while describing kissing him.

She couldn't understand why he could be so exciting and scary at the same time. Why was she drawn to him when she knew he was wrong? What he had done was wrong. Force her, take her.

And yet, he also made her feel safe.

How could anyone make her feel all these things at once?

Sansa huddled a little further under the covers, a little chilled now she was alone in bed and the wind was growing stronger, howling around the little house. Maybe she should have waited for Sandor to go to bed too. Now she would have the lie in the cold bed and lie awake for hours.

Footsteps on the stairs made her peek her head from underneath the covers. She watched Sandor walk in, his shadow making him seem even larger than he already was.

‘Can’t sleep little bird?’ His voice was deep and dark, longing. It sent shivers down Sansa's spine, pleasant shivers.

‘The wind is growing stronger outside,’ was her answer. He smirked and then started to undress himself. Sansa realised he was joining her in bed. Earlier than he usually would. Was he doing this because he was tired, or because she had gone to bed early?

‘You have nothing to fear, this house is strong. It will not even be damaged on the outside.’ He sat down on the bed to remove his boots, before he removed his pants and stood now in the dim room, only in his underwear. Sansa watched his muscular body.

He had a broad chest, strong arms and a lean stomach. She could see some abs on it. She swallowed. He was fit and strong. And actually, not at all unattractive. Not in the slightest.

He walked around to his side of the bed and stepped in, puling the blankets over himself. He sighed deeply as he turned on his back. When the wind cut sharply past the house one more time, Sansa shivered, which made Sandor chuckle.

‘You're not afraid of the wind, are you?’ Sansa bit her lip at the sound of his raw voice. But she also heard his amused tone.

'No, I am not.' Yet she shivered again when the wind picked up.

'Come here.' It was not an order, not a command, but an invitation that Sansa gladly accepted. He rolled onto his side and took her in his arms as she moved towards him.

As always, it was wonderfully warm. He felt like a rock behind her, one hand caressing her softly on her arm and his lips pressing a kiss on her hair.

‘How can you always be so warm?’ Sansa sighed. Sandor laughed for a moment.

‘Fortunately, I am, little bird. Maybe because you hate the cold.’ Sansa felt herself feeling sleepier instantly, completely surrounded by warmth and a soft bed.

‘Maybe,’ she mumbled, before closing her eyes. The only thing she heard was his chuckle before she slipped off into her dreams.

* * *

Sansa was starting to appreciate the nature around their house more and more. Sandor would start each day outside, chopping wood and feeding the animals. Today Sansa had joined him, feeding the chickens. It was still a bit chilly outside, but not as much as the day before. The chickens didn’t seem to mind at all.

She enjoyed their running back and forth and happy sounds. The little chicks grew fast, but eggs were hatching all the time, so there were more and more little chicks every day.

‘Won't we have too many chickens when all the chicks are grown up?’ Sansa asked Sandor after feeding the animals and they walked back into the house.

Sandor gave her an endearing look before clearing his throat.

‘No Sansa, we'll never have too many chickens.’ Sansa gave him a questioning look, and he seemed to doubt for a moment whether he was going to answer it or not.

'How so?' Sandor bit his lip for a moment, then gave her an apologetic look.

‘We don't just have chickens because they provide us with eggs, little bird.’ Sansa's eyebrows shot up. Sandor grinned painfully.

‘We're going to eat them too ...?’ Sansa asked, her voice showing how she felt about it. Sandor nodded.

'Aye, little bird. We will. '

* * *

After that confession Sansa had grown a little silent. She had always eaten meat and had never felt bad about it. She always tried to buy the products that ensured her the animals have had a nice life. But seeing the chickens and cuddling them knowing one day she would eat them made her feel guilty and sad.

After lunch, Sandor had gone back outside to fix a fence and Sansa had joined him, now walking around the green grass, still close enough to the house that Sandor could see her. He had told her she was free to roam as long as she stayed closed to the house or asked him to join her and she was not trying to anger him. She just wanted to think and enjoy the fresh air.

The wind was getting stronger already and there were dark clouds forming, but it was not raining just yet. Sansa walked around the house, so she had a nice view on the island and just stared before her.

Her mind was so full she had no clue where to start to think things through.

The sounds she heard were those of birds chirping, the wind and Sandor cutting wood to size. It was restful and peaceful. Actually, very nice. Unless your head was full of thoughts you didn't want to face.

Sandor had tried hard to open up to her, she had understood that much. But for her it was not to very easy. His ghost had died down. At least, a few of them. Hers were still very alive and they still scared her. Too much actually.

Petyr had ruined her interest in boys and men. Made her fearful of what could happen and that she one day would be trapped with someone who would hurt her. And her family had made her feel so alone, everyone busy grieving on their own.

Tears burned behind her eyes as she felt the first raindrops fall down. They made her wet and cold, but it was also soothing in a strange way. It was almost as if she registered it was cold, but she was not really feeling it. For the first time her mind felt blank. Empty. And that was nice. Sansa looked up and let the rain mix with her tears. It was freeing to be outside and, in the rain, letting her pain wash away. Cooling her fears.

She shivered, but not thinking and feeling anything was too great to move. To end it. She could stay here a little longer. Let the rain wash away just a bit more-

‘Sansa what in the hell are you doing!?’ He sounded livid as he came towards her. Sansa was not even that bothered by his angry tone. He sounded more worried anyway.

'Are you totally out of your mind?' He bent down and dropped to his knee in front of her. She saw his eyes look at hers. She saw concern and a slight panic in his eyes. Why?

He brought a hand to her face and wiped away her tears.

‘You're freezing.’ His tone was much softer now. He took her easily in his arms and then got up. He walked quickly to the cabin, not even bothering to close the door behind him. He bent down by the fire and put her there on the floor.

‘You're soaking wet.’ Sansa registered everything that happened around her, but she didn't feel much about it. No pain. No panic. Not even when he took off her wet coat and sweater.

‘Come on, Sansa, you have to get out of those wet clothes before you get sick.’

Sandor took a fleece blanket from the chair and put it around her shoulders before removing her shoes and pants. Sansa didn't object but didn't respond either. It wasn't until she was in her bra and panties that she pulled the blanket closer around her and her eyes looked up at his worried eyes.

‘What got into you?’ His words were soft. Worried. Anxious.

Sansa swallowed and reached out to his beard, which still had drops in it.

‘You got wet too, Sandor.’ Sandor swallowed hard, examining the hand that was just pulling away from his beard.

‘Sansa-‘ he started. She swallowed.

‘I was enjoying being outside. It was nice. It helped me to… get through some thoughts.’ His eyes looked at hers in worry and she saw he had half a mind to take her in his arms, but he waited. He restrained himself. Why did he do that?

‘What thoughts, little bird?’ He sat down next to her, his big body close, warm and soothing.

Sansa bit her lip and looked at her hands.

‘About Petyr and my family. You.’ Sandor froze. Sansa took a deep breath.

‘After my father died, my siblings went their own way. I was the only one who stayed behind to take care of my mother. I felt I had too. She was so alone. She was so broken.’ Sansa closed her eyes as she spoke on.

‘Petyr came into my mother’s life a few weeks after… we lost dad. He was kind to me, and to her. He cooked, helped her pay the bills and he truly seemed in love with her. I was so happy for her. I really was, until-‘ Sandor growled lowly.

‘Until he started molesting you?’ Sansa watched him beside her. He trembled a bit and she wondered if it was from the anger he felt. She only nodded.

‘What did he do to you?’ He spoke through clenched teeth. Sansa took a deep breath and then decided to share her story. For the first time.

‘It started with innocent touches, he always found a way to brush against me, take my hand in his or to even hold me. But then, when my mother would go out again, after she started to feel better, he sometimes made sure we were alone.’ Sansa had to stop there. What came next was ugly. Painful and scary. She looked up to watch Sandor, who still sat there with a clenched jaw and fists. But he was not moving or saying anything. His eyes on hers, telling her to go on.

‘He once came when I was already in bed and he… touched me. Used his fingers on me, took his clothes off and got into bed with me. My mother came home before he could… finish what he started. But it was enough for me to move out. I tried to tell my mom, but she didn’t believe me. She said I was jealous of her and Petyr and that I had a crush on him. It broke my heart. I moved and never went back. Not once.’

‘Sansa,’ Sandor’s voice sounded broken too, like he was in pain. It was what made Sansa look at him.

‘It is in my past and I would like to let it stay there. I have no wish to ever see him or my mother again.’ Sandor could only nod.

For a moment they sat in complete silence. Sansa registered Sandor’s fists on his knees. He was angry still. Somehow that also made her feel safe. He felt for her. Like she had for him when he had shared his story with her.

‘You told me your story, and I am glad you did. I am thankful for it.’ Sandor looked surprised as she said those words.

‘Now you know my story too.’ He nodded and looked at his hands.

‘I will never touch you again, if that is what you wish.’ Sansa felt a slight pang in her chest as he said those words.

‘That’s why I never… went out with anyone. After moving out and starting my own life I… I was glad I could escape from intimacy. But I know that it’s not normal to never be with anyone. I just didn’t know- don’t know how.’

Sandor looked from his hands to her eyes and sighed.

‘You were right yesterday, when you said I like for you to hold me at night. It has started to feel safe. You have not tried to force me into more. But I would-‘ she stopped there, not sure how to go on. She felt her cheeks grow red. Sandor cleared his throat.

‘Little bird,’ Sansa shook her head to make him stop talking.

‘He’d win. He’d win if I cannot learn to enjoy anyone else’s touch.’ Sandor could only nod.

‘The way you took me was wrong. And you forcing me was too. But… I like being here. Some days I don’t, most days I do. And I feel safe with you. And cared for. I just… I don’t know if I will be able to give you more.’

Sandor nodded again, and then looked away.

‘But I want to try.’ It where those words that made him look at her again.

‘What?’ he sounded not surprised, but completely amazed. Sansa swallowed and went on.

‘I cannot help but how wrong it is that I want you to hold me, to touch me and I don’t know if I can even stand anyone’s touches. But I dream about it. I want it. I only picture you when I think about intimacy.’ She felt how red she had become after saying those words. But it also felt freeing, especially when she saw the emotion in Sandor’s eyes.

‘You gave me a year. We can try. If… if you can handle me being awkward and panicking and… unsure and inexperienced.’

For a long time, Sandor stared at her, not able to say a word. And when Sansa felt herself become more unsure, afraid she had said all the wrong things, he brought his fingers under her chin, to lift her face and look into her eyes.

‘I do not deserve it, not after all I have done. But I will take anything you have to offer, Sansa. One word from you and I will stop. Not matter where we are or what we are doing.’

Sansa swallowed seeing the intense gaze in his eyes. The grey almost black now, as he watched her eyes, before they lowered to her lips. She licked them nervously.

She had never spoken so honestly with anyone. And she had always thought that when she did, it would be awkward and painful. But she had never thought it would be like this. That she would feel like this.

She needed more. She wanted more. She moved a little closer and watched his face as he remained where he was. She licked her lips again and then moved hers again his. He took a second to respond, before he pulled her in his lap and kissed her back, quite hungrily. She felt how strong his hold on her was, even through the blanket. But this time she liked it, enjoyed it even. And when she felt his tongue move against her lips, she did not hesitate to open her mouth and gave him everything she had to offer.


End file.
